One blood.

Returning home...Or at least as close.

Dallas is a very busy place. A bustling city that never sleeps. It was the swinging sixties when I last set foot in the place of flashing lights and constant crowds.  I travelled to this place with a human consort, a male of youth and curiosity who didn't shy away from my fangs; he was that strung up by the newly mundane party drugs and the alcohol that seemed to flow freely that he didn't see me as a vampire, he just thought me a fellow freak...it was very easy to take his blood. 

But he never filled the hole, the hole i kind of hoped he'd at least make less hollow. Gerard. My mate. He was my love, he still is my love...even if the worst nightmare is in fact true. I wasn't just ripped away from Amelie, i was ripped from the man i love...the man i intended to marry. As one of my kind, i know all too well that the bonds of a relationship when forged are eternal, one does not forget a lover; when ones mate is ripped away and the future is unknown the hole is never to be filled- you see in all my years, in all the parts of the world  i've explored i have never came across a man that could even be worth an ounce of what Gerard means to me. You see he was my light, a personal fortress of safety. My father didn't liked him, Bishop didnt like the fact he didnt have control of me; Gerard was on my fathers' personal hit list; i just hope that if Amelie is alive...and this isn't me sentencing myself to something unholy, that maybe, just maybe she will be able to give me closure- tell me just what became of my dear one. Gerard was a warrior, a mountain of a man- which had served him well in his years as a breather but in his conversion he was spectacular, a force to be reckoned with. Yet even with coldness and detachment Vampirism can produce, he had a strong hold on his humanity; his heart was on his sleeve, he didn't sly away from emotion he was maybe a whole millennia ahead of time; for me he was like fresh air- a ferocious warrior with a heart. He towered over me but instead of making me feel inconsequential; he made me feel like the only girl in the world; even Amelie, had to wait for him. Saying that Amelie always put me ahead of her; she was as slight as I am but even as a child she had a harsh streak of warrior instincts; she was a leader and all i can remember of my memories with her include her protecting me; until the last moment when she went down fighting. She was not just my sister, she was my mother for all purposes other than my birth. Our true mother was a frail woman, our father was a cruel man; and for his queen he took a young bride; i think in these modern days myself and Amelie would be called products of rape...Mother died at our fathers' hands...some sort of haemorrhage, the blood took him by surprise and well he ripped her throat out; drained her dry. After that i was always cautious to be around breathers,for as long as i could until loneliness starting to take over; even then i kept them at a distance; never allowing myself to get too close...except once. 

Right here, right in Dallas. 

I left him in Dallas. Never saw the sole again. I'd drank from him that night, which wasnt a unusual thing; he was high on some pill he'd popped that we're experimental to say the least; and when i bit, when i drank from him he didnt act horrified at my fangs...i wish...he got horny... and for some reason i let myself lie with that man and drank from him again in the throws of human passion... That night i feigned sleep, and when he was most certainly in a heavy drugged filled sleep; i left because that second time i almost couldn't stop...almost. I was not becoming my father. 

I walk with quick steps to the Taxi site; the driver looks me over a little too long to be comfortable. The sun is thankfully not harsh and with my hat, sunglasses and collar pulled up i'm safely covered; and blend in with the winter crowd. I take the cab to the very edge of Dallas, thankfully the sun hasn't progressed so I can run across the expanse without too much difficulty. The sun is past it's highest point, I should make it by sundown- the safest time of day Twilight, hypocritically enough! 

That's one thing that annoys me, Vampire culture. There is such a feast now; from the basics of cheesy horror to flowery, poetic love. Living in the modern world, one will come across such things and although it annoys me -many of the pathetic qualities that author portray-i find them in their own way, rather amusing. My particular favourite is Meyer's creation; glittering like diamonds in the sun? I wish! Unless she like her diamonds covered in flames, she is rather wrong. Life is rather hard when its documented so wrong, or in the sickly, romantic ways authors love to portray the supernatural. Life for everyone is so hard compared to the graceful and camera angled perfection of video-image. Girl yearned for the love of Mr Edward Cullen; envied Miss Isabella Swan; little did they know they could of came across something slightly less picture worthy if i had of been a male, a hungry male vampire.