Be Still My Heart

Chapter 9

The truck finally came to a stop and I knew where we were. It was a beach that my parents bought when we were kids. It was a very small private one blocked by the house in front of it. I knew about it because the four of us would come down here during the summer and have small parties.

"I thought you were taking me somewhere I didn't know about?" Aiden got out of the truck without saying anything. I followed him as he walked away trying to catch up. When I was finally in reach I grabbed Aiden's wrist and pulled him back "Why did you bring me here?"

His eyes held a look of sadness I haven't seen in a long time. "After his funeral, I was so angry with you and I had nowhere to go to feel like I was with him. You locked yourself in his room and I didn't want to talk to you. I had a senior on the football team drive me down here and I stayed for a few weeks. My mom brought me food every few days and I texted her every night so she would know I was fine. This was my place to be with him."

A tear fell and my heart broke. It had never occurred to me that Aiden would've had to leave to grieve, that being home was harder than running.

"I'm sorry Aiden. I should've been there with you when you were hurting. I think it would've been easier on us both that way." Aiden shook his head.

"I shut you out. It's my fault that we didn't have each other and I know that." I wanted to argue it because communication goes both ways. "Can you tell me more Cami?" I nodded my head and the tears came almost immediately.

"Well, two ambulances showed up along with a crap ton of cops and a few firemen. They had to cut Camdyn out of the car which woke him up. I won't forget him looking over at me and saying "Aren't you glad we took Dad's car and not mine." At that moment I wanted to reach over and thump him in the forehead."

I heard Aiden's deep laugh beside us while we walked down the beach shore.

"We were taken in two separate ambulances and I cried the entire time. I knew he was in bad shape and it scared me. I got in the hospital and they took me in but I knew I wasn't the one they were worried about. They did a routine check-up along with a CT scan to make sure I was completely okay. I came out with cuts, bruises, and a lot of mental turmoil. Finally, they released me and I'll never forget running through the hospital to get to his room." I had to take a deep breath because my throat felt like it was swelling making it difficult to talk.

"You were outside of his room with your head in your hands. Your tears fell from your face to the floor and I almost stopped until I turned and saw Camdyn. He looked so broken. He was connected to so many machines that were all keeping him alive. Izzy was holding his hand talking to him. I should've waited until she was done but my feet kept me moving to him. I couldn't stop looking at the tube going down his throat." reliving this night was hard but I had to do it.

"Izzy left and I sat in the chair next to his bed. I told him what the doctors had said. They told me he wouldn't make it through the night that he was already dead. That the only thing keeping my bubby from being dead was the machine pumping oxygen through him. That he was alive but gone. I told him that I believed he could pull through and that we were all there for him. My parents were across the country on business and couldn't catch a flight but I told him they were on the way. I promised him that if he didn't make it that I would be there for Izzy when it was time for her to move on. That I wouldn't hate her for it and I would still be a bridesmaid at her wedding if she asked." I couldn't help at smile at the thought of Izzy being happy again, in love again.

"I also promised to keep an eye on you. I told him that no matter your feelings about me that I would always watch over you. Even if it had to be from a distance I would keep you safe. For the first year after Camdyn died, it was hard for me to do that. I had to keep my distance so you wouldn't notice but you were hiding from me and the truth. I told him that I loved him and that even if he had to leave me I would always love him."