Excerpts From A Story Ill Never Write

Two

Nothing compared to what I was feeling in this moment. The thought of me ending everything scared me more than ever. Now standing in front of him my throat drying with every breath I take I know there's no going back. I look at his hazel eyes and for the first time I feel nothing. All I could think about was the first time I met him, young and afraid. We needed someone but I now know his life will go on.

He flashed his normal side smiles as we walked the sidewalk of our old neighborhood.

"Do you remember that day in the hospital when you kissed me?" I gently asked him.

"I do" he looked over at me but my eyes stayed glued to my feet.

"Do you ever wonder what would have happened if you hadn't done that?" the words rolled off my tongue freeing themselves from my mind I had kept them in. He froze as I kept walking.

After waiting for him to say something I finally turn around my heart beginning to pound against my chest.

"Do you think we're trying to hard to make this work because of what we've been through? Hell you stuck by my side for three years when I was in a coma, thirteen years before that, two years now I mean don't you wonder what life is like aside from me? We fell in love over tragedy and I don't want to see that come to an end but I don't think me and you can keep doing this without one of us feeling like we need to rely on the other to live...right?..." I tapered off feeling our whole life together slowly drift away.