Can't reach you

Deeper

Part 2 is finally done! Let me know what you thought! Somehow it all went less angsty then I planned but uh...I guess there's time to get more depressing in the last part lol

This chapter happens around EP.18~19ish of season 1 and starts around the Ku-Atr-Mika hug thing at the end of Ep18.

"You're pretty amazing, Kudelia."


"Even Orga can't do things like that."


His words seeped into the wounds, barely healed from the 'Kiss Incident', like venom (which they never spoke of and Orga pretended didn't happen. Both of them carried on acting like they always did towards each other.)

Orga could feel the bud, which had grown from all his feelings in the last week, start to slowly unfurl into the ugly, bitter flower named Jealousy.

So she does one thing and she's a goddess, huh?

He wondered if Mikazuki had forgotten that there was a high chance his friend had heard the whole conversation between him and the girls. He had run into Mikazuki on the way to the canteen (as he had a quick few minutes to grab something to eat before going to see Naze) and they had exchanged greetings before Mikazuki told him that he had to go and find the girls quickly and excused himself. Unfortunately, against his better judgement, curiosity led him to follow and he ended up witnessing the whole scene.

How much more do you fucking want me to do to keep being your everything? Pull more fucking miracles? I'm sorry I'm not a fucking noble who can negotiate. I'm sorry I'm a shit leader and not the perfection you want me to be.

The white haired man turned and walked away when the three hugged. That awkward hug. Okay, Mikazuki was building a harem or something. Whatever. It didn't matter to him. It really didn't.

The boys at CGS's favourite past-time (the little they had) was to talk about girls. Of course, there weren't any at the company, but that didn't stop the teenagers from sharing their ideals and all the stories of encounters that obviously never happened. Orga never bothered joining in, mainly because it didn't interest him one bit.

"Heyyy Orga, what about you?" Eugene turned to him.

They were all sitting in their dorm before lights out and as usual, the subject turned to girls (or something like that). Orga had switched off from the group conversation at some point and had ended up having a (sort of) staring match with Mikazuki, who was snacking as usual and staring at him at the same time from his bed, while Orga was sat on the floor, his side casually lent against the shorter boy's bunk.

"H-Huh?" Orga blinked, looking away from those sharp blue eyes to look at the other boys. Clearly, his face had confusion written all over it, as they all burst into laughter.

"We were talking about getting a girlfriend, Orga. Like, you know, your type, what kinda girl you see yourself with and that stuff." Shino explained, raising a brow. "Though with Mikazuki stuck to you like that, it might be hard I guess. Would kinda be a bit of a cock-block to have you and your friend come as a set..."

Orga shrugged. It had always been just him and Mikazuki and it never bothered him, nor did he desire to be with anyone else. He was content with fulfilling the promise they made with each other to be together forever.

"Dunno. Not that fussed about girls, to be honest."

"Man, don't be so boring!" One of the other boys joined in.

"You always say that, Orga. I swear you might as well marry Mikazuki at this rate!"

Orga knew it was a light hearted joke, so he shrugged again.

"Could do. Would stop you guys pestering me about girls then?" He replied with a grin.

The other boys burst into laughter and Eugene rolled his eyes, shaking his head. They soon picked up the conversation again between them and Orga wondered if he should go to bed.

"If Orga wants to, we could."

Mikazuki's voice made Orga look up.

"Huh?"

"Get married. We are going to be together all the time anyway, so it makes sense."

"Uh..."

Orga understood what Mikazuki meant, only because Mikazuki's thought processes were simple, yet so messed up at the same time. Orga seemed to be one of the only few people who understood what Mikazuki really meant with those few words and it made him smile. Mikazuki meant Orga was a special person to him.

"Well... I don't know if it's possible to get married..."

"Why?"

"Because we are both guys and you can only get married to women..."

"Oh. But I don't want be with some woman, I want to be with Orga."

"Uh... thanks? But I mean, when you are older, you'll feel differently. Probably."

"No."

Those unblinking eyes were fixed on him again. They always were. Waiting for his decision. Waiting for an answer. Orga ran his hand through his hair a little awkwardly, thinking about how to settle this, as the younger boy would just carry on waiting for him to come up with a solution.

"...But I guess we can pretty much say we are, huh? Just... not on paper."

"Not on paper?"

"Like, we can't actually get married, like, wear a white dress and get registered and stuff. But what matters is the bond between us, right?"

"Yeah, okay. I like that."

It took weeks to explain to Mikazuki after that, about not telling everyone that they "were married, but not on paper", because they would think he was odd.