*six years ago*
"I can't wait to find out what we're having today Kayla!"
*current day*
I couldn't wait to have our first daughter together. I've been with Colton for three years almost four. He was the love of my life and I know we were really young but I'm so glad I have him. Thru the thick and thin he had my side thru everything. And I can't wait to be with him forever. And start a family with him, he was truly the best thing that ever happened to me. I couldn't even really be happy without him to be honest. We were together for what seemed like forever. When I first met Colton he stole my heart. I was fourteen when I met Colton. He was the cutest boy I ever met wearing his football uniform. I was the nervous band geek girl. He was the most sweetest person I met. Talk to me like a normal person back then it was the stage where girls thought guys had germs and were not nice. But he stole my heart and I couldn't imagine a life without him. Everyone always use to tell us teenage love never works. That puppy love never lasts. We were together for three years when I got pregnant. It came as a shock to everyone. Because I had straight A's and was always having my head in the books. Even with being Colton I had know I wanted to go to college and make the best of my life. When we found out I was pregnant with a little girl me and Colton were so excited. I couldn't believe that I would get to raise my daughter with my best friend. It was the best thing that ever happened to me. He is my best friend and I couldn't wait till we were ready to raise her. I knew that he was my soul mate. And he was everything to me and I couldn't wait to marry my best friend and raise a baby with him. And when I was six months pregnant Colton asked me for to marry him and I couldn't wait. Then everything changed so suddenly. Three weeks until my due date I couldn't wait to have her. I was at home so sick and Colton was going to work it was like any other day. But this day was marked by tragedy. He was killed in a head on drunk driver accident. The car hit him so hard that he was thrown out the window and left on the road for dead. The driver was to drunk to stop and keep driving. The driver was charged with a hit and run and manslaughter. Colton's life just started and it sucked that he wouldn't ever get to met his first daughter. Or even get married. I knew that he had so much love in his heart and he wanted to be a dad. Just the thought of him not being here for all that sucks. Because we have a beautiful little girl who will never know her real dad because of someone else dumb choices. It breaks my heart that Colton won't ever get to meet his daughter.
I sat on the couch waiting for Bella to get off the school bus. She was such a big girl now she is in first grade. And it drives me crazy on how much she looks like her dad. The same smile and laugh, every time I look at her I see a lot of Colton in here. I should have know that she would have looked like him. When she was born it took me a while to want to hold her. I didn't want anything to do with her to be honest, because I didn't want to do it all alone. He should have been there when she took her first breath and was suppose to help me thru the labor. And someone took that all away from us. And it drove me to the point where I had an emotional break down when i was at the last weeks of my pregnancy because I didn't want to be alone. Even though I had all this family and support it felt like I was alone. Because they wouldn't understand what I wanted and how scared I was. Now that I have a four year she is my everything. I wish he could have been there for her first steps, her first tooth, and so much more. It was so scary but I know now that he is helping me thru this. And watching over us. Bella was so smart and brave. Everyone was so scared on how I was going to tell her about her dad. But I mean it is one learning experience at a time. When I told her about Colton last year on his three year's of him being gone. I had his older brother be there with me so she better understood. Bella was so understanding and she knew that he wanted to be here. And she wasn't mad or anything which made me feel good. I saw the door swing open and she ran over to me and gave me a hug. " mommy I got a A on my math test!" I smiled and replied," I'm so proud of you! Now go get ready to go to grandma's" Even though Colton ain't here anymore his mom wants to have one night a week with her and I more than willing to do that because Bella is his legacy. That is the way Colton lives on thru this world is his little girl. And I'm so proud that she does it so strong and strong minded, I love her. And I'm so glad I got pregnant when I did I wouldn't change it for anything. But the nights when I'm not with her leaves me scared and alone. I haven't been alone since before Colton. All the thoughts drive me crazy and how bad I wish I was with him again. I'm just hoping I can make it for this little girl.
