How to rule a king

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Alexei:

I had spent the rest of the night blaming myself while holding the girl I had nearly raped and killed, in my arms.

How could I?

My body had long gotten used to the intoxication that came with my rather heavy consumption of alcohol. Had I not spent so many nights whoring and drinking myself to sleep? Yet, I had never hurt anyone, as my son was lying soundly in his bed in our private quarters being watched by a nanny while I fucked a couple of whores in a more secluded part of the den not far from the fortress and drowned myself in vodka.

I rarely paid visits to any other brothels since I didn't want to encounter one of my many enemies while was being buried balls deep in a cunt used a thousand times before as I sipped vodka from a bottle. Also having your own room to entertain such pleasures was definitely a plus. As I could simply pass out on top of the not seldom bloodstained mattress once I threw the whores out after getting tired off them. The next morning I would pop a painkiller or two after taking a quick shower in the adjoined bathroom before making my way back to my apartment to have breakfast with my son.

This time was supposed to be no different. After discussing next week's weapon shipments Piotr and me had made our way to the fortress' entertainment chambers, which were located in the southern dungeons.

After a quick change of words and far too many drinks with my fellow brothers in crime, we had found ourselves separated as each of us had taken their preferred whore to a different chamber to do "the dirty deed".

Nina, a classical blond, curvy, yet tall beauty had been my choice of the day. She was already used to me and my preferred ways as I had had her a couple of times before. Not that she was overly satisfying, they never were. At least not for my inner needs. My body might have been satisfied with the way her breasts would feel in my hands as I gripped them a little too rough and my dick might have been pleased with the way it could bury itself into every hole she had to offer without hearing any complaint from her. Yet, she and the others could never bring relieve to my soul. Even when I was fucking them drunk beyond reason I would never allow myself to really let go. I always stayed in control. I never allowed myself to feel. And deep inside I hated it.

Despite all the whispers of how hard I liked it, they still had no clue of how much I was still holding back. How much I had to restrain myself from not slitting the women's throats as I rode out my orgasm. How I was always holding back when fucking them. I didn't want to hurt them this bad. I felt nothing but pity for those women, yet I didn't wish to see their faces torn with pain. Still, holding back always made me even more angry than I already was. I went there to find release, yet all I ever found was a harsh fuck that wouldn't satisfy my body for long, while my soul shattered even more with every day that went by.

This night, however, had been different. I had demanded of Nina to get on her knees with her head placed on the mattress looking to her left, her already bonded arms stretched out in front of her. I always took them from behind. I didn't want to see their faces as I fucked them. Their overdramatical screams of pleasure were enough for my hands to search for their throats, I didn't need to see the sick joy on their faces as I used them.

How can women get off at the fact that they are a means to an end and nothing more? How can they enjoy themselves knowing I am so disgusted by them that can't even bear looking at their faces?

However, this time Nina hadn't complied as usually. Instead of moving onto the bed as I had told her to, she had made her way towards me, speaking slutty words to lure me into her arms. She had tried teasing me for a while, her bound hands gripping my cock as her fake nails had drawn blood. Disgust had shot through me.