Girl On Top

Chapter 7- Regrets

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The aching in my skull ebbed and flowed like a cold tide, yet the pain was always there. I suddenly understood at why they call it a hangover, for it felt as if the blackest of clouds were over my pounding head with no intention of clearing until late afternoon.

I rubbed my head and looked around, I was in a bed but it wasn't mine! Where the hell am I? My knuckles rubbed against my closed eyes attempting to rub the sleep away.

I was more aware of my cracking headache than the layer of dehydrated saliva that coated my cracked lips. Once on my feet the room swayed almost causing me to loose balance and I reached out for the wall. My hand slipped along the high sheen paint and I sprawled onto the carpet with a crashing thump. The room swirled before becoming stationary again and I used the bedstead to pull myself to standing. This feeling meant I'd had some fun the night before but somehow it wasn't there in my memory.

This apartment was still very new to me. I didn't know which boy owned which room since I had never actually been inside any of their rooms before.

But as I examined the bedroom I was in carefully there was one thing I was certain about. This was not my bedroom.

My eyes lingered around the room trying to find clues, any sign of where I was. Wait, was I even in my apartment? My heart began to beat faster as my maze of thoughts flooded in, completely throwing me off my investigation.

Gasping, I was taken aback by the unbutton dark blue and white checked shirt that lay messily on the floor besides the bed.

I recognised that shirt from last night. Pursuing my lips together I attempted to figure out which guy was wearing that shirt in the party. As I got the lightbulb moment the culprit trudged into the room... it was Sebastian.

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I froze as did he, my stomach tightening. No no no please be a dream. Sebastian blinked slowly only now just closing the door behind him.

"Uhm hi," his voice cracked as he nervously fidgeting with one of his dark brown curls. This was most definitely not a dream, crap.

"Hi," I whispered, awkward silence filled each and every corner of the room. Each passing second making me want to shrink and hide away. I didn't want to face the reality. I didn't want to face the music.

"Good party right?" Sebastian smirked, looking smug. I glared at him and his expression wavered. "I mean not good party right?" He bit his bottom lip anxiously.

When I didn't say anything he exhaled, "what do you want me to say?" His eyes pleading for me to look at him, to finally face the music.

I gulped. "What happened last night?" My mouth instantly became ten times dryer than it was before. How was that even possible? At this rate I was going on to die of dehydration. At least it would get you out of this awkward situation my brain comprehend. Ugh why did I think like this?

Once again the impending silence gnawed at my insides causing goosebumps to creep up my arms, I shivered.

Sebastian had one hand behind his back while the other picked at his lips. I studied him and watched as the corners of his mouth spasmed, he was trying to stop himself from smirking.

"I found this on the floor when I woke up." He takes away his hand from behind his back, his fingers closed over his palm in a fist, slowly, he removes each finger to reveal a used moist condom. Good god.

I was not going to freak out. I took in a long deep breath trying to control myself. It's totally normal for people to have sex with strangers when they were drunk. That's called a one night stand idiot.

"Shit!" I cursed aloud, Sebastian smirked and threw the old condom in the bin. He watched as my hands began to shake uncontrollably, I lifted my quivering hands and covered my face.

Regret washed over me like the long slow waves on a shallow beach. Each wave was icy cold and sent shivers down my spine. I wish I had never done that, I wish I had never slept with my roommate. There was no way back. There was no way to make a change. It was impossible to go back in time.

"Andy it's okay." Sebastian scooped me into his lap and rubbed up and down my arms trying to soothe me, it was kinda working.

My tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling down my face. I felt the muscles of my chin tremble like a small child and I look to his dark eyes, as if they could soothe me.

"I'm such an idiot!" My eyes dripped with tears and I face palmed myself. I felt Sebastian curse silently as he continued to rock me forwards and backwards.

"No you're not," he reassured. "You were drunk and so was I, don't even worry. It's okay. I'm here." I sobbed into his chest unceasingly, my hands clutching his white damp shirt.

"Thank you you're a good guy," I snorted as my nose began to run, "oh god your shirt is ruined." I dabbed my hands over his chest trying to dry the wet spots over his shirt, he chuckled and grabbed my wrists.

"Andy who cares about my shirt? I don't even need to wear shirts, I can take it off." A playful grin appeared over his mouth as he chuckled, I roll my eyes.

A serious expression forms on my face as he lets go of my wrists. "Promise me you won't tell anyone. Oh God, please don't tell anyone!" I begged and continued to rub my eyes.

Sebastian looked down at his hands before looking back up at me. "You have my word Andy." His voice sounded sincere but the thing was I didn't really know him. I didn't really know any of my roommates, but somehow I knew I could trust Sebastian.

"Come give me a hug, this morning has been a lot." Sebastian extended his arms out welcoming me in to his strong embrace. I giggle before snuggling up to him.

He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and pulled me close, gently rubbing my arm. What was it with this boy and rubbing my arm? Despite the heaviness in my stomach, it fluttered at the feeling of his body pressed against mine.

Lessons I learned from this experience were;

One, not to drink too much to the point you can't remember anything and end up sleeping with one of your roommates.

Two, that I was going to be alright even though what happened.

• what do you guys think of it so far? •