Denial & Desire [ #Wattys2017 ]

Chapter 6: Tingly

"Hey Che wait, up! what the hell is wrong with you?" I said hauling my hand from his grip, he literally pulled me from the lobby to the parking lot.

The look he presented on his face was completely unknown to me. It expressed a ray of emotions at the same time. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Was he hurt, pained, sad or lonely? I just could not place a finger on his affect.

I hit him a slap on his hand and shouted "Dude what the fuck, you now called Clark Cater dad! Explain yourself."

He was confused almost lost or words like the little light in his head went off. I noticed that he had a habit of running his manly hands through his unruly hair everytime he was frustrated or in deep thought. He must have been drowning in the thought of whether to answer me or not because he was now racing his hands furiously.

"There's nothing to explain, what the hell do you want me to say, Imani!" Che lashed back "Get in the car and let me take you home Empress."

He outstretched his hands singling me to come, but since I have known myself I had never been an obedient girl.

"I'm not getting in the car unless you explain yourself!" I said backing away from him.

He sighed and continued to pass his two hands through his silky hair making it ripple. His usual bubbly aura was way gone and replaced by a dark tense sensation. His face was now serious almost aggressive but hurt reflexed in his eyes. I could have told that I ventured over an imaginary line that clearly marked stop don't proceed. His thoughts seemed to have been playing tug or war in his mind, but he finally broke the silence and spoke.

"If you want to know get in the car, we'll talk and drive."

I opened the door for myself and sat firmly in the front seat. I turned my head to the driver's seat waiting for him to enter the car, a second later he did and we departed Clark Cater & Co.

"I didn't know Clark Cater had kids." I prompted him to start speaking and slowly he did.

"He doesn't. It's just me, Clark Cater is my dad but I just like to consider him a sperm donor." He said trying to hide the uneasiness that came across his face.

"Huh! Sperm donor what do you mean?" I spoke softly knowing it was sensitive ground.

He laughed a lot but I could tell he thought nothing was funny "I'm his illegitimate son Empress, I first met my dad when I was thirteen." He said, "That's a dull story and I don't want to spoil your evening."

I knew the problem wasn't that he didn't want to spoil my evening but he didn't want to spoil his. The pain on his face was overwhelming so I decided not to push the conversation any more than this.

Compared to his usual state it's weird seeing him in such an array. He delivered me back to my apartment but this time he didn't take a long way and the silence in the car was deafening, so much that a buzz rang in my ear.

This isn't the confident Ché Mattews that I knew. Everything about him was off right now. Like telepathic thoughts, I believe I was telepathically feeling his pain. He reminded me of a wounded puppy that just needed some affection.

Who would wound a puppy?

He'd opened the door for me and gave me a weak smile. "Are you okay?" I questioned

"Yea I am," he said in an unbelievable tone.

"Okay" I gave him a polite smiled and turned to head up my stairs when he called out to me.

"Hey Imani, could you keep today's findings just between us, I don't think everyone needs to know who my so call father is." He said in a low gruff voice.

"Sure Ché, no problem." I smiled and entered my apartment.

I stepped inside the apartment but it was empty there was a note from Layla on the refrigerator saying that she would be back before 9 that she was with her friends.

I was relieved that I could have done my favorite past time in peace, that is soaking in my tub. Something about water relaxes my nerves but the silence in the apartment triggers my unwanted habit of over-thinking.

I dropped my bag on the bed and stripped down to my bare skin and entered the bathroom. I filled the tub making the water as hot as possible and threw in some of my melon and cucumber bubble bath. I then placed one foot in the tub flowed by another then leisurely immerse my body into it. I was in nirvana. I exhaled as the hot water gradually pulled the stiffness out of my body. I sat there looking up at the ceiling and thought to myself:

There had never been any news that Clark Cater has a son, shit the man is a business tycoon surely if he had a son it would have been known and his son is Ché, how could it be?

I can't deny their resemblance but why keep your son a secret, is it because he's illegitimate? that's not his fault you're the one who had an affair. This is too much to process geez! and he wants me to keep today's findings between us, what the hell surely Emily and Akira is a part of us right?

He's always so bubbly and smiling so the cautionary feeling I got while speaking to him a while ago was scary. He's hiding something and I want to know what it is but something tells me it's complicated and I shouldn't meddle.

I noticed the goose bumps on my skin, these things seem to be happening a lot lately every time I thought of Ché. I don't know why but the thought of him makes me feel tingly but one thing's for certain is that this tingly feeling brings nothing but trouble. I've had my experiences with guys and what I have learned is that there all after the same thing.

Bragging rights.

It's quite sickening honestly and the outcome remains the same so why do I always hold on and hope those one-day things would be different. It's precisely this hope that hurts me the most when things go wrong. Even though I really want it to go right for me why doesn't it!

I'm terrified of what I want the most.

How hypocritical.

But I've already made up my mind I won't waste energy on casual flings and put in so much time and effort on someone who says one thing and act another. Not again I simply can't do it, not after how much they've hurt me.

To get out of that feeling of worthlessness, like never being enough much less never being understood is the hardest, so I tried to convince myself that those things only existed in movies and clearly, I'm not an actor.

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Hey, guys don't forget to comment, vote and follow if you haven't thus far. The support is greatly appreciated. This Chapter is dedicated to itzelxstories thanks for the new cover hun I really did appreciate it.