One Drop of Golden Sun

Ch. 6 Between Smoothies and Screwing Up

*Ray

Ray's phone buzzed at the same second as she was getting hired. Talk about timing.

Beth: Get your a** out here. I'm hot.

Ray: I know you're hot. It's why we are in Hawaii.

Beth: So I can sweat more? Get out here.

Ray: in Greenland you'd melt all the glaciers. Almost done.

Beth: 2 minutes, at the wall

Ray: you got it hottie

She waved one last time to Miller, didn't see Lokela, but figured he didn't care whether or not she said goodbye and hopped into action. It would take two minutes to get to the beach if she jogged, which wasn't really her style.

Half speed-walking, half skipping (because yeah, she just landed her dream job here in Honolulu), she hurried from the shop, and headed towards the sparkling sand across Kalakaua Avenue.

Beth reclined in a narrow strip of shade created by the concrete wall that divided the beach at the end of Waikiki, a huge, all paper to go cup and straw in one hand.

"I made it," Ray said, throwing herself in the sand next to her. "And I got myself a job."

"Congratulations. This is the best smoothie ever. See?" Beth held up the cup, where the words Best Smoothie Ever decorated the cup.

"Oooh. What flavor?"

"The flavor called 'you don't get to taste because you don't deserve me.' Ha."

Ray frowned at her—there was something off with her voice. "Beth? What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Besides you left me out here for nearly thirty minutes. Russell was so busy with your closet, he didn't notice we weren't back, but I noticed. I have a life, you know."

"You got the best smoothie ever and you are sitting on a tropical beach. How sorry am I supposed to be?" Ray asked. "Now are you going to tell me what's really wrong?"

"Nothing," Beth said, but her voice hitched. She raised a quick hand to wipe at her eye under her dark sunglasses.

Ray hooked the sides of the frames and gently lifted the glasses up. Beth wiped another tear in the mascara streaks under her eyes, and stared resolutely out to sea.

"I knew it! What's really wrong, Beth? You can't lie to me."

Beth sniffed, slurping the last bit of her smoothie. "I'm two days late."

Ray gasped. "But that's good! That's what you want, isn't it? Did you take the test?"

"No, it's still kind of early."

"Early? My pearly-white behind! If I was two days late, I would be peeing like crazy on every test they had in the pharmacy. Hey! I know, let's go get one now, they have public restrooms at the park and we can surprise Russell." She knelt in the sand, ready to get up.

"Stop, Ray. Just stop. Don't do this to me," Beth begged. Pools of tears gathered in her eyes. Ray dropped back, sand burning her bare legs.

"All right, I'll stop. What exactly am I doing?"

"Just don't be excited. You have no idea what this feels like, and I can't have you excited for me, when I...it might not...I can't fall in love in this baby. If it is a baby."

"Beth, this is what you and Russell want."

"And after three miscarriages, I can't allow myself to hope this time. We aren't even trying right now. It's probably the stress of getting you settled and my new studio ready that's making my period late." Beth wiped both cheeks and shook her head. Something in the sand must have been fascinating, because she was studying it between her feet. "That last time nearly killed me. To see my hopes and dreams, my baby gone while I was on my drive to work. You can't understand."