We are humans

chapter two

Chapter 2.

Maddie ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

Sixty seconds.  ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

A minute contains sixty seconds. Time: it's objective-subjective. For everyone, a minute just is a minute. The time goes as fast as it goes. There's no difference. If you live in America, China, Europe, Africa... It ticks away with the same rate. Tick- tock- tick- tock... Try to close your eyes and count the seconds in your head. Then open your eyes again and look at the timer. How many times did you count the exact amount of sixty seconds in one minute? I guess it's almost impossible. I've tried it before, and I never succeeded; I always failed.

Therefore, sixty seconds; one minute. It can go so fast. Just think about the time you're watching a movie, or when you're talking to your friends on a sleepover. The time goes so fast if you're having fun. But then; you have the sixty seconds of torture. Think about it; how slow the arrows of the clock in front of the classroom ticks during Geography, or during maths. Or when you're sitting there, and people are yelling at you how worthless you are. Because that's what girls like me are, right? Worthless.

But every time they're telling me these things, I've tried for myself to find a cure; a kind of bubble where I crawl into when people like you and others are telling me again what kind of stupid girl I am. Every time, I hold my breath. I hold my breath and count the seconds. And I will tell you a little secret; the seconds go so slowly when you're holding your breath. First, you think you're the queen, because you don't need oxygen. It's overrated anyways.

But then, when you reach thirty seconds, you start to feel your heart beating faster and faster because it realizes it's out of oxygen. You're so caught up in holding your breath, you're so caught up in surviving that you don't even hear the words they're saying to you. My personal record is three minutes and eleven seconds. That's the longest time I held my breath. My lungs and brain were practically screaming for air, I felt my heart beating between my ears, and my vision got blurry. But then, I breathed again. And from the moment you breath again, you feel more alive, and strong as ever. You feel as if you won; but in fact you lost. You lost because you were too weak to live without oxygen. You're dependent on it, and I gave up after a little longer than three stupid minutes.

180 seconds, what's that in a life? Studies have proven that a human can live without oxygen for ten minutes. But I was so weak that I gave up after the miserable three. Like I said before: worthless. Words don't kill, they say. But in fact; they do kill. I'm still waiting for the day that I'm holding my breath that long until it literally kills me. Because then I would be a 'someone'. I would write history as the girl who dies because of words.

But that's not how it works right? Seconds tick away slowly, and minutes feel like hours. I don't know why I'm here on this world. And I don't know what I'm supposed to do here. Because be honest; why does a world need a nobody?

I'm lost. Totally lost, and I don't know what to do with myself, nor how I'm supposed to survive it on this world, this planet, this earth. I'm still waiting for the day to come that I'm not weak anymore.

I'm still waiting for the day that I can hold my breath as long as necessary to not feel the pain anymore.

END OF CHAPTER