hopeless fountain kingdom // A Tronnor AU

Hopeless

Dear Troye,

God, how am i going to start this? I hope you're fine right now.

First of all, i'm sorry if i need to make my roommate, Jacob to give this letter to you. i was too scared to leave you this letter by myself. i hope you'll forgive me for that.

i'm sorry i can't be there for you right now. i think its better for you without me. damn, you must already in a relationship with someone else right now since i told Jacob to give you this letter after a year i was gone. i know i was being a dick for making you to wait for this. i just want you to already get over me when you're reading this. at least it would make it less painful for you.

i'm sorry again since i can't find another way to fix everything up. you don't know how much i was struggling with my own demons for years. it hurts Troye. i hate it when i kept listening to the voices in my head. i've tried but i failed. i don't want to fuck everything up like i usually did and i don't want to hurt you anymore. you're struggling with your own demons and i'm just making everything ten times worst than before.

you know my mind was all fucked up since the day you met me at the party. it just getting worst i guess. i thought i was getting better after the day i met you. i really hope that it was true. you really do break my heart Troye on the day that i left. when i thought how complicated our relationship was, i wondered how the hell we still together after years of fighting and shared kisses. then i thought that this must be real since i still stay until the end. i hope that hopeless changes over time. guess it never happened, right?

also, did you still remember the day in the woods where we skipped school and we lay on the wild flowers? where you asked me about what song that could describe you? after years of thinking, i think the best song that could describe you was The Beach by The Neighbourhood.

why? i don't even know it myself. it just, everytime i listened to it, it reminded me of you. it reminded me of us.

if you ever found the letters about my mental illness, please don't tell my parents about it. i've been hiding all of it from everyone for years. i don't want them to blame themselves. i really hope that you're the only one who know about it okay?

i think this is it. guess everything must come to an end, right?  i'm sorry for breaking my promise, Troye. you know the truth hurts but secret kills and i'll always love you. i really am.

cf

《《《

*edited*

So this is it. The end.

God, I never thought I'm going to finished this ff in the first place. I also never thought that people would read this crap actually and all I want to say is THANK YOUUUU for reading this! Especially you susancomer since you continued to read this until the end 😂

I'm actually working on another tronnor au and again, it based on halsey's album called ROOM 93 and i already done the first chapter (and it was longer than usual) so I thought i'm going to publish it s**n.

Not troye's s**n actually so yeah, i'll start to edit this book later. See you s**n.

-n