Regal [h.s au]

33. Goodbye

HARRY

Amelia's reaction to my confession was to hold me tighter in her arms and whisper soothing words into my ear, even a few phrases in her native tongue she knows I like to hear from her mouth. I know she is a cheerful person, constantly wearing a grin on her face, but it takes her a while to show her deeper emotions, so I didn't take it to heart when she didn't say it back. Eventually, I've calmed down even though my pain hasn't disappeared, it has only subsided into a dull ache permanently settled in my chest. This is the pain I will have to learn to live with from now on.

These moments of serenity are the final ones I'll ever spend with her because in less than a week I will be a married man with a woman I never wanted to have as my wife by my side. Katherine will become my wife and queen in the eyes of the people, but she never will be either of those for me. That role has been occupied by the woman whose arms are holding me and bringing me comfort at the moment, the woman I love.

I lift my nose and nudge it against her neck, my lips pressing into the smooth skin below her collar bone. Amelia looks down at me, her palm gently cradling my cheek as she leans forward, a small gap dividing our faces now. She patiently waits for me to make the final move which almost causes me to smile; it's our little routine we've established. I prop myself on my elbow to hold my weight, craning my neck as I close the gap separating us, connecting my lips with hers.

The kiss we share is slow and tender at first, our lips smoothly gliding and enclosing over the other, but it's as if both of us want to show the other what we truly feel, it evolves into something more lust filled and eager yet loving at the same time. The fact this won't happen ever again brings me pain I wish I never had to experience and only deepens my need for her.

I shift myself above her, my hands on either side of her head as her fingers that have at one point tangled themselves into my hair drift further down, tracing over my neck and shoulders, leaving tingles and a slight burning sensation in their wake. Her hands roam the surface of my back through my bedclothes, that being the only piece of fabric covering my body. She clutches the material in her hands and slowly begins pulling it off me, the pace not being nearly as fast as I need it to be, now that I have a chance to be with her like this after so long; a final chance.

Tearing my lips off hers, I fist my shirt below the nape of my neck and haul it over my head, carelessly discarding it on the floor aside, leaving me bare. The room temperature is chilly, but I don't seem to notice from the heat permeating the air between us, heating my body and building my desire. Amelia's lips find mine again and I plunge my tongue into her mouth, tangling it with hers. Wanting to feel her as soon as possible, I move one of my hands down to her thigh, beginning to drag my palm over the outer side of it, wrinkling and hiking her chemise upwards on my path.

My fingertips dig into the skin of her thigh as I suddenly press the front of my body against hers, pinning her hips with mine, creating friction that makes me release a small groan. I wrap her leg around my waist, deciding her chemise is lifted far enough to grant me access to her opening, my hand moving between us so I can guide myself inside her. My actions are interrupted, however, when I feel her hands on my shoulders lightly pushing me away.

My expression changes in alarm, my brows furrowing in worry. "What is it?"

"Not like this," Amelia quietly says, shaking her head. "You are hurt, angry... I don't want you to be. Let me take care of you tonight."

A sudden realisation washes over me as I take in our situation with slightly widened eyes, the fact I was ready to take her only to release some of my built up tension striking me.  Her chemise is not even completely off, I was about to settle for nothing but a raw and quick release, something neither of us wants, especially not in this circumstance.  This is the night that is going to burn itself into my memory, the night I should try to memorise as much of her I can, and that's exactly what I am going to do.