author's note: this is a letter to someone, non-fiction or fiction? maybe the former, maybe the latter.One month and twelve days. That's all it took for you to be my ball of happiness yet my greatest sorrow. It was the first day of camp when my eyes laid on you. You were silent. You were hiding behind your camera lens, filming the event, so focused and driven, not noticing the girl in braids and glasses. When you smiled at the camera, maybe satisfied of the outcome, at that moment, I knew. Second day, the day I was crying so hard because of my wounds but you were there. You talked to me. "How's the food? Can I sit here?" You asked and for the second time, I knew. The days passed by, but you were still stuck in my mind, like a song I can't help but to play over and over again. We talked over an app. And since that day, I just knew.
You always called, singing me to sleep, singing to annoy me, singing to soothe my problems, singing to make the conversation alive, singing to voice out your emotions. You were probably my favorite part of the night (midnight, should I say), you were my daily dose. You made me feel things I wasn't capable of before. We are the real definition of opposites attract, but it doesn't say that opposites stay together, right? It just attracts. We attract, for you are the positive one and I'm the negative, but we can never be. You, your voice that annoys the hell out of me but still my favorite to hear, your stupid reminders that I constantly ignore, your laugh that makes me go mad, your jokes that I really find old and cheesy but are highlight of my day, I will miss all of that. I will miss you, you ugly idiot. For you will always be the sunrise of my life, waiting for it, not minding the sleepless nights, just so I can look at you, admiring the beauty, beauty I would never get tired of and beauty that I will never get to call mine.
In that second, I knew. I knew you were going to be my sweetest downfall.