I wonder what it's like to wake up and love yourself.
To look in the mirror and not want to cry.
To weigh yourself, see the number and not want to puke.
To be with friends and not feel ugly.
To be in public and not feel insecure.
To go shopping for clothes and not feel fat.
I just wonder;
What it's like to love your life.
"Guess what you stupid fuck, that will never happen!" I yelled ignoring that fact that I could be heard. I placed the razor on my bloodied skin before hacking at the skin allowing streams of blood to pour out of each fresh wound I left.
The world began spinning and it was nearly like I was flashing in and out of reality. My head throbbed along with my wrist and before I knew it darkness consumed my vision and my scarred body crashed against the floor shattering my heart in the process.
G R A Y S O N S P O V
"EVERYONE PLEASE STAY IN THEIR CLASSROOM UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE, THANK YOU" a loud voice boomed over the intercom.
I raised my head and looked around to see everyone panicking. "What if it's a mass shooter or a murderer?!" People shrieked hiding in little nooks and crannies in the classroom.
I rolled my eyes and continued on with my work. It probably wasn't anything that serious. Everyone in this school is either stupid or over dramatic.
"ALL TEACHERS AND STUDENTS PLEASE EVACUATE THE SCHOOL IN A SINGLE FILE IMMEDIATELY" the voice on the intercom interrupted.
"OKAY CLASS STAND IN A SINGLE FILE AND WALKED THROUGH THE HALLWAY CALM AND QUIETLY PLEASE!" The teacher shouted clapping his hands together.
I dropped my pencil and stood up out of my seat standing in a single file with all the panicking teenagers. We walked down the school hallway and out to the parking lot where many ambulances and cop cars were parked.
"What the fuck happened?" I mumbled under my breathe for no one but myself to hear. "EVERYONE CAN LEAVE, WE WILL INFORM YOUR PARENTS ABOUT THE SITUATION LATER!!" The principal yelled over the voices of all the confused kids.
L E N I N S P O V
I woke up on dirty school bathroom floor. The blood that stained the floor and my razor and bag were no longer in the cubicle with me. Where did they go?
I sat up confused. My bones felt weak and my head was pounding. I stared down at my wrists and was shocked to see the scars that once filled my pale skin were gone. No trace of them left at all.
My skin had a sparkle to it and my skin was tan and my thighs touched. What?! Why am I not scared? I lifted myself off the ground and walked out of the cubicle.
I stared in the mirror, shock was the only emotion I could feel. My thin brown hair was now thick with blonde streaks. My chapped lips were now full and pink. And my eyes. My dull eyes were now booming with life and happiness.
"What. The. Hell?"
I watched as a skinny girl emerged from the stall behind me. "Who are you?" I questioned backing away from the broken girl.
"I'm you Lenin" she spoke. My eyes watered. "You finally got what you wanted" she started. "What do you mean?" I questioned raising an eyebrow. "You're vanished from the world Lenin. You're happy now. I'm here to say one last goodbye" she said like sadness was the one talking for her.
I'm dead. That's why I'm beautiful and happy. I engulfed the broken girl in a tight hug. It was like hugging a bag of bones. My heart broke for her. How could I have let myself get to that state. To a point where I starved myself to death.
Suddenly the girl vanished in my arms.
I'm no longer broken.
B R O K E N
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This chapter is very powerful.
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Thanks for reading m'loves
