Justice League: The Teenage Years{Book 1: Complete}

Episode Twenty: Acceptance

Hal's pov

The night was warm with a nice breeze in the air. I decided to take a stroll around my neighborhood, to escape my brother's fury. I was getting so sick of Jack's bitching about everything I did, so taking a break was a perfect idea.

I passed by house after house, thinking about all my problems. Besides for the fact that I was an arrogant piece of crap, I was also the worst best friend of all time. But despite me knowing all of this, I still couldn't bring myself to make amends with Barry. After we met up in the mall, I was really going to call him, to make everything right. But I kept pushing it off and it eventually became so much easier to just ignore the matter entirely. It was not smart at all but I never really made smart decisions.

"God where am I going.." I sighed holding my father's pilot jacket closer to me. I missed dad a lot but I missed him more than ever when I was lost. I wished he was here to guide me through this hell and tell me what to do. I chuckled to myself because I knew exactly what to do but for once, was too scared to actually do it.

"Damn it dad." I cursed kicking a small stone out of the way. "I promised to be fearless, to conquer all fear but here I am, too scared to even reconcile with my best friend.."

I stood in silence, thinking for just a moment that my father would answer. But Martin Jordan was dead and he was not coming back.

I closed my eyes and lifted my head back, feeling the wind rushing through my hair and the sensation made me feel alive. I would have loved to fly in the air, to be able feel the wind all around my body as I took towards the skies. I laughed at this euphoric feeling and started to run towards the wind with my arms stretched out.

I ran past the houses and into the forest area of my neighborhood. I jumped onto each log and leaped off as if I was about to take off. I looked up at the night sky and grinned stupidly at the stars in the sky. Because I was living in the city, seeing the stars was a rare occurrence that I enjoyed greatly.

I always imagined what was beyond the stars, wondered if there was life in space. I used to dream that I would become a space cop, a guardian of earth and defender of the universe. But that was a childhood dream and I have since grown up from it. I was going to become a pilot like my father had been, even better than him. I would not let my mother, Jack or anyone stop me from accomplishing my dream.

I climbed up the nearest tree so I could get a better look at the beautiful night sky. I remembered the nights where Barry and I would sit on a tree and discuss our theories of the universe. Barry did not believe there was any life in space because of the atmosphere of each planet. He would laugh at my idea of space cops and guardians. Barry was a logical  guy who did not think people could live simply from dreams. But even so, none of this stopped him from defending my dream to become a pilot. No matter how silly Barry may have thought the idea was, he would not hesitate to defend it when someone challenged it.

"God Bar...you really fucking suck you know that?" I chuckled sadly. "I thought it'd be easier to just ignore you but..." I looked down at my feet, feeling so small. "But my life is so incomplete without you.."

The breeze blew the trees branches and a few leaves fell onto my lap. I picked one up and ran my finger across the soft part, biting my lip.

"But as always, you're right." I said angrily. "I need you Bar! I need you and I didn't realize how much life sucks without you...." I punched the tree. "God Damn it! I hate how stupid I am! I hate how I can't even keep one important person in my life..without screwing up!"

I hugged myself tightly, letting my hands cut off my circulation. I was so angry with no one to blame but myself, the worst feeling of all. I sobbed my eyes out, not even caring that I was acting pitifully.

A dagger zoomed past my cheek and stuck through the tree. I embarrassingly shrieked at the sudden movement, slowly turning to look at the dagger. There was a small piece of paper hanging onto it and I could only assume whatever was on it, was written for me. I pulled the dagger out of the tree, moving the dagger in my hands to get a better look. There was a bat ingrained on the handle and I guessed that this was Bruce's way of contacting me.

"Fuck spooky.." I sighed as my heart rate finally returned to a normal pace. This must have been urgent because Bruce always became scary when he meant business. I took out the paper attached to the dagger and unrolled it.

Jordan,

Barry is in trouble and needs you,

You're a huge idiot but don't let this become one of your mistakes,

The big race is very close and Barry needs you,

Don't. Fuck. This. Up.

-you know damn well who   

I stared at the note wide eyed. I felt myself no longer afraid or even hesitant of my feelings. I was not going to admit that Bruce's note made me realize how stupid this all was but it did. I nodded at the note, feeling determined and fearless once more.

"I'm in love with Barry." I told myself climbing down the tree. "I'm in love with a boy, with my best friend and I'm okay with this!"

I started to run towards the edge of the forest, feeling a rush of excitement that pushed me even farther. "I'm in love with a boy!" I said once more and with every time I said it, the happier I became. "I love Barry Allen!" I laughed reaching the end of the forest and back into the neighborhood.

"I love a boy! I'm probably bisexual and I'm so fucking happy!" I couldn't wipe the smile off my face as I ran down my block, screaming my new realization. My neighbors gave me strange looks but I couldn't care less because I finally accepted myself.

"I love you Barry." I smiled as I ran. "And I swear I'm going to make this right." I stepped onto my porch and gave one final glance towards the trees. I saw a figure on one of my neighbor's roof and I didn't fight my smile. The figure gave me a small salute and I nodded over to him, knowing exactly who it was.

"Thank you spooky."