Phan- Noises

Home

I feel soft breathing on my neck, and I open my eyes. They take a second to adjust to the bright light seeping into the room, like water into a sponge. I hear a soft giggle behind me. "Good morning Bear." My face heats up and I jump out of the foreign bed. "Oh, Phil... I um..." he giggles again and slips on his glasses. I feel a warm spot on my hip-- where his hand must have been. "Was my bed nice?" I gulp and try to formulate a sentence. "Yeah... warm. Mitzi... she was whimper- wait no. You were whimpering and I thought-" "you'd come in and whisper sweet nothings to me? Yeah I was awake. Thank you for that Bear. Very nice. I had actually wanted you to feed Mitzi, but it's fine." Bear? Since when did Phil call me that? "Oh. Oh? You weren't asleep but you... how?" He chuckles. "I was half awake. I just know you whispered to me, and sorta sat next to me for a while. I don't remember anything else." He raises his eyebrows. "Was there anything else?" I shake my head quickly. He didn't need to know I watched him, or held his hand. "So... you're not mad I slept next to you?" He shakes his head. "It was nice and warm, and it's very cold in here. So thank you actually." My hands are sweaty so I try to wipe them on my pants that... aren't there. I realize I only have a shirt and boxers on. I feel my neck burn and I don't know what to do. I could feel Phil's eyes on me and I couldn't just run away. "No p-problem Phil. I just wanted you to stop whimpering. Guess I helped both of us, huh?" He nods. "Wanna have breakfast now?" I look around. "Sure. Eggs and bacon is kinda all we have. I'll cook." I stroll out of the room, and hear Phil's feet shuffling behind me. I rush to the fridge and grab the eggs, and the bacon. I start to prepare for cooking, then I jump as Phil comes up behind me, humming as he grabs my hips. "Can you put some peppers in my eggs?" I do my best not to move. "I'll do it for all of them. Sounds good." I try to move finally, but Phil doesn't let go. He moves closer to me. His chest is against the fabric of my shirt, and I feel my lungs clog. "Thank you for breakfast Bear. Really." He presses his lips into my curled hair, and backs away. He moves to the counter, and I try to move without falling over on my legs which felt like jelly currently. "No problem Philly." I hear a contented hum behind me at the counter, and I quickly grab the red bell peppers out of the fridge and begin chopping them into pieces. I finish up then cooking, and make one plate for me, one for Phil. I hand him his plate and he smiles. "Looks good." I chuckle. "I think food in general looks good to you." He laughs loudly, and does his little tongue bite thing. I can't help but grin widely, and he studies my face. "You have beautiful eyes Dan." I freeze. What is Phil doing? I know this has to do with last night, but this was seriously scaring me. Mitzi makes her way into the room and barks lightly. Her collar jingles in the quiet of the room and she barks again. My heart pulses, and I ignore the little chocolate brown pug. "Phil. What is going on." He looks up from his food lazily. He has a sly smirk on his face. "Nothing. Why do you ask?" His smirk grows wider. I wanna slap it off of his handsome face. I glare at him. His eyes scream innocence and I just can't help but... lean in. Slowly. And he starts to do the same thing. Weird. But maybe not. He places his hand on the small of my back, and the other on the back of my head. I grab his neck with both hands, and we meet in the middle. With our lips. I feel everything... stop, but speed up. Like my life was moving so fast, but this moment was lasting forever. His soft lips paired on mine. His hands searching my body. My lips part slightly as he moves his hand further down my back, and he flicks his tongue along my bottom lip. He pushes me against the counter, and we just keep going. Well, until he lets go on me. And steps back. Everything feels normal again. Then my stomach twists. And I knew I messed up. Phil looked confused as I felt, and I didn't know why my boxer shorts were a teensy bit tighter than before. They shouldn't do that. Not around Phil. I step back, and take in his features. His jet black hair, still in a little quiff on his forehead. His lanky arms stretched to where I had been standing. His eyes looking down, his eyebrows furrowed. His lips... they were a bit more red than usual. It looked beautiful. But that wasn't something I should say about him. This was weird. This was not right. But I liked it. So what did that mean? I didn't care to answer myself. I rushed back to my room without another word, and I hear Phil's long yet patient footsteps following. I leave my door open and pull my knees to my chest. I screwed up. This was wrong. But it was right. And I felt okay. Phil looked okay. Better than okay. "Phil. What did we do?" He shuffles. "I think we kissed." I nod. "Yeah, obviously. But, was that... did you?" He nods. "It was good. You're good." I look back down at my toes. Maybe this could be normal. "Is this something that will happen often?" Phil doesn't respond. "What are we?" Phil breathes in and out and whispers, "Maybe we don't have to be anything." My heart is moving fast, and everything is moving just too fast and it's stressing me out. It makes me want to hurl but I just couldn't stand up because I was so dizzy and- Phil grabs my shoulders and shakes me, and then he wraps himself around me. He was still warm, and it felt like I had a protective case around me. I felt at home. I wrap my arms around Phil, and everything slows again, my ears stop ringing, and I can breathe. "You're okay. We can be whatever you want, okay? You're fine. You're safe." He kisses me softly on the back of my neck. "Can we just keep doing this... I mean off of camera, but can we also just not name it? Can it just be us, can it just be normal?" His breathing is steady, and calm. He doesn't respond quickly, and I can tell he's just calculating. "That sounds good." I turn to look at him, and he's just so perfect. His hair is still a little fluffy and falling in his face, and his eyes are clear and blue as always. His lips, oh his lips. So gentle and pink, soft as velvet. He was the only thing I needed. Well other than food, water and shelter, but that's besides the fact. I was in love. And he just understood me. It made sense for him to, we'd known each other for eight years. But after my childhood of not really having anyone to turn to, Phil being there for me was a blessing. And maybe I had had a crush on him before this. Maybe. But all that really mattered was now. This moment. Phil holding onto me, like I might disappear if he was to even slightly loosen his hold on me. Phil was home.

Okay so like idk why I felt the need to post this but... here? Idk this isn't very good for a first post but whatever.