I was in the shower
And a song came on
And it sang "I'm not gonna write you a lovesong"
And I realised
I wrote poems about all the dicks in my life
Except for you
My best friend
So I decided to do that
So here it is
For you
My best friend
=============================
My best friend
Hi
I don't know how to start this
Even though I technically already did
Okay so
I haven't written about you yet
I want to call you a dick in sentences
But they just all come out wrong...
I wanted to say you're the only dick I haven't written about yet
And you're the dick that can hurt me the most
It just doesn't come out right
So, I know I might not be your best friend
But you are mine
And I could say that that doesn't hurt
Or that I don't care
That it doesn't bother me
But of course it does
Because it sucks to care more about a person than that person cares about you
So sometimes I can't say the things I want to say
Or I say it, but it just doesn't have the desired effect
But then again, I don't even know what I desire
I know that I'm scared
Scared to lose you
Scared that you'll stop talking to me because you found someone else to talk to
Scared that you'll replace me
I'm scared that you won't miss me
And I don't tell you stuff
Because I'm scared I'll scare you away
And I know I'm annoying
And I need attention
And I get hurt when you joke about some shit
And I keep pushing
And I have issues
And I am sorry about all of this
But that is me
I love how we love the same things
I love how I am actually good with your family
I love how we kind of have the same humor
Well, with this I just wanted to tell you that I appreciate you, and I love you, and you're a real dick sometimes
But that is you
And I can definitely live with that
=============================
I wish I got to tell you this
Before you decided you were too good for me
I wish I got to tell you this
Before you decided my biggest flaw was too big for you
I wish I got to tell you this
Before it was too late
Now it's too late
I'm sorry I did this to myself
Just know that I hate myself more than you hate me
YOU ARE READING
Road To Recovery
PoetryThis is my book. These are my thoughts formed in poems. These are the poems that help me with my recovery. It doesn't feel like a recovery. It feels like pain...
