Lyrical Abstraction (Hamilton) [on hiatus]

Chapter 2

"You told me you'd broken it off."

Alex looked at Thomas. They were both fully clothed now, sitting next to each other on the bed. Thomas was switching between having his head in his hands and looking at Alex. Alex grabbed his hand.

"I was going to, I-I promised you I would and-"

"Stop lying to me."

And damn, the truth stung. Alexander was lying. He really didn't mean to lie, but he wanted Thomas as much as he wanted John and he didn't know how to have both without lying to both of them. It was justified but he wanted to fix this. He wasn't sure how though.

"He said you've been together for ten years."

"Married. Married for ten years. We've been together for sixteen."

"You were together before we even met."

Alex sighed and squeezed Thomas' hand.

"I know."

"And you didn't bother to tell me."

"I'm sorry."

"Are you though?"

Alex didn't answer. Truth to be told, he wasn't sorry. He didn't regret meeting Thomas, he didn't regret hooking up, and he didn't regret keeping it a secret for their sake. Because this was for their sake, right? He was doing this for them so they could be together. He was doing this for Thomas, why couldn't he see that? Alex let go of Thomas' hand to throw his own in the air.

"Thomas! Thomas, I was doing this for us! You knew I was married!" he said, pointing an accusing finger at Thomas.

"Since, like, a month ago!" Thomas exclaimed, "We've been together since the war! When were you planning on telling me?" he finished, tears brimming his eyes. He was hurt about Alex lying to him, and he was hurt about splitting a sixteen year relationship. Alexander fell silent again and it spoke more than the million words he usually spat a minute. His face sank.

"You weren't planning on telling me?"

They just sat there for a while, none of them uttering a word. Eventually, Thomas couldn't handle it anymore. Too many questions, not enough answers. He let himself fall on back on the bed, sheets still messed up from earlier.

"What made you change your mind? About telling me."

Alex threw himself down next to Thomas and turned to look him in the eyes.

"Because, like John said, our ten year anniversary was coming up. I didn't know how much longer I could hide it for."

"Why would you even hide it from me?" Alexander could hear the hurt in Thomas' voice and put a hand on his cheek.

"Because I love you."

Thomas believed him.

"What about John?" Thomas asked.

"I'll go talk to him."

"And what about me?"

Alex was silent again. Thomas could barely believe that one of the few time he wanted Alexander to talk, the man was silent.

"Talk to me babe..." Thomas muttered. When Alex just looked down, Thomas huffed and sat up. "I think it's time I leave."

-

John was sitting in the livingroom, face in his hands, when Thomas appeared, very much ready to go. John looked at him, his eyes puffy and red from crying so much. Thomas instantly felt a pang of guilt shoot through him at the sight. He felt terrible, and maybe Alex was right. Maybe it was Thomas' fault. He left without a word, leaving John and Alex to sort their things out and wait for whatever Alex would decide for.

-

John was a mess. He was sobbing uncontrollably into the phone, poor Eliza trying her best to make out what he was saying.

"John, John, slow down." Eliza's voice came from the other end of the line, "Take deep breaths. What were you saying about him?"

John gasper after air until he was breathing somewhat normally again, tears still streaming down his cheeks. He swallowed shakily. He still couldn't believe this and was actually willing to blame it on anxiety giving him bad dreams, but then Jefferson exited the bedroom and he knew what happened. Choking back a sob, he quietly muttered, "Alex cheated on me..."

"Alex did what?" Eliza asked, shocked. Alexander was one of her best friends and she had never expected him to do anything like this. "For how long?"

"I-I don't know. I found him in bed with Thomas-"

"Thomas? As in Jefferson? But he's so nice..."

"I called to ask if I could stay at your place for a while? I don't really feel like being here anymore." John said, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt when he couldn't find anything else to do with his free hand. Eliza smiled sadly at the other end.

"Of course. You can come over whenever and stay as long as you want. Ugh, I'm gonna lecture Alex so hard the next time I see him, this is not okay. Why he would do this is beyond me."

"Yeah... Me too..."

-

When Alex came into the livingroom, finally ready to talk to John, he found no one. He checked the kitchen, John's studio, the bathroom, and every other room in the house but didn't find John anywhere. Had John left for good? Most of his stuff was still there, and none of his painting materials were missing so Alex was assuming he just went to sleep over at someone's, but he couldn't help being worried.

Despite his actions, he loved John.

Maybe not as much as he was beginning to love Thomas, but it was still there, and now John was gone and it was his fault. No. It was Thomas' fault. This, this whole thing was Thomas' fault. Thomas made him cheat. Thomas made John leave.

Alex flopped onto the couch and picked up the phone. John had to be somewhere, and if Alex had to call around to find out where, he'd do it. Eventually he tried calling Eliza.

"Eliza-"

"He's here, but you're banned from my house until he's ready to see you again."

Okay then. Not what Alexander had expected for a greeting. For a moment, he said nothing.

"Eliza, I need to talk to him."

"Well, he doesn't want to talk to you. Goodbye Alex." she said before the phone was slammed and the line cut off. Alex frowned. Why was John being so difficult?

Alex wanted to solve this with at least one person. He called Jefferson.