Be With You

Chapter 7

Cutting. You had been fond of it since that depressing night. It was official. You would forget about Baekhyun and pay more attention to the people who actually care for you. Problem was, was there actually someone who care about you? Neesha? Well, she was too busy with Sehun. Chen? Tao? They were too much focused on this shitty school, which technically ruined your relationship with Baekhyun. What about Kai? He was actually--you could say--caring. He treated your scratches and was about to save you that day. He advised you to fight and take care of yourself. You hadn't known him for so long, though. You didn't know if he was just being nice or he really cared about you. You let out a big sigh.

You pondered a lot during lunch break in school, and in times, you would run to the restroom. You would lock yourself in the stall and take out a blade you always had in your pockets. Then you would cut your wrist. Your wounds and scars were too many and getting obvious. You started wearing sweatshirts and long sleeves even on the warm days. Without you realizing, it had been a new hobby of yours. It was the only way to let out the pain you feel every time you see Baekhyun.

A school showcase once again would be held in school. You didn't plan on joining at that time. Your memories stabbed you on your chest and killed you as you saw the poster on the bulletin board. You remembered the first showcase you did with Baekhyun. It was also the first day he met his new "cool" friends, and the day you started losing him. On your way back to the lunchroom, unexpectedly you saw Baekhyun and Chanmi together. You rolled your eyes and took a seat in the corner. The lunchroom was almost empty and quiet, and you weren't that far behind from them, so you could still hear their conversation. You flinched as you heard Chanmi ask Baekhyun to be her partner for the school showcase.

"Oppa, would you be my partner for the showcase? I really want to sing with you," she asked shyly.

"Oh really? Sure." Baekhyun replied brightly without hesitation. Chanmi celebrated with joy and unpurposely glanced at you. You gave her a stern look. You could see her lips curved into a smirk, light enough for Baekhyun not to notice.

Then, she spoke, "But oppa, i'm just worried. You usually perform with your best friend, don't you? What if she gets mad and do something to me again?" She pretended as if she was scared.

"Well, I guess she's not my partner anymore. And we're not in good terms right now so," he paused. "I'll just make sure she wouldn't hurt you."

Your heart felt as if it was pierced. The way he said those things sounded as if he was giving up on being your best friend. And the fact that you were the bad person in his eyes shot you with an arrow. It was a bull's eye. Your tears welled up your eyes, and you ran to the restroom. Your tears blurred your vision, but you didn't care and found your way.

You locked yourself in the stall. You put your hands in your pocket and looked for the blade you always had with you. Your eyes were blurry because of the tears flooding out of your eyes, and you accidentally stabbed your fingers with the blade.

"Ugh shit!" You shouted, but your voice didn't come out. You wiped the blood off of your finger and started cutting. You cried as you drew red lines on your left wrist. Your throat was burning from resisting to cry outloud. As you did the last cut, you accidentally put more pressure and cut it deep. Blood was continuously dripping out of your wrist. You stood up and panicked as blood kept dripping on the floor. You wiped off the blood and used a ton of tissue. Finally it stopped dripping--that was what you thought, at least. You rolled down your sleeves to cover up your wounds.

You walked out of the bathroom, letting out a big sigh of relief that you were still fine. As you walked down the hallway, you met the tall and dark young man once again.

"Hey __, what's up?" Kai greeted with a wave.

"I-I'm uh, good!" You forced a big smile.

"Have you heard about the Showcase?"