Ferris Bueller Shorts

When Jeanie Got a Car

Ferris and Jeanie rushed down the stairs.

"Out of my way, loser!" Jeanie laughed, shoving her way past Ferris.

"In your dreams," Ferris retorted, trying to quicken his pace to beat her in the unannounced race between twins.

Just as Ferris was about to make a clean getaway towards the kitchen, his mother stepped in front of the staircase. "Hold it right there you two. We'll do this at the same time. Jeanie will get her gift when you get yours, Ferris," she stated with a smile that a mother with several surprises would have.

"Both of the gifts are outside, for the sake of you guys both being out there when your father takes a few photos. Smile this year please. I don't want a repeat of your fifteenth birthdays," Mrs. Bueller lectured. She cracked open the door. "Honey, are you ready?" She asked.

"Yeah! Camera's ready!"

"Okay," Mrs. Bueller stated, holding the knob. "Go ahead!" She swung the door open and Ferris and Jeanie comically battled to get through the doorway first, squeezing through painfully.

In the driveway was a large tarp. It covered, to Ferris' confidence, a car, which he had been asking for for as long as he could remember. He hoped it was a Camaro or a Corvette, and not some shitty Honda like Cameron had gotten.

"Okay, kids," Tom Bueller said, one eye behind the video-camera he was toting. "Go for it!"

Ferris and Jeanie turned to each other to share a grin, both knowing what was underneath, before ripping off the tarp. Underneath, was a 1985 Pontiac Fiero SE, in a shade of white that Ferris knew was going to get dirty so quickly. The two of them circled the car like a hawk, admiring its beauty in the Illinois sunshine. The windows were tinted, the front plate said 'TBC' and the car was new, clean and shiny.

Ferris looked at Jeanie, grinning from ear to ear. "Jeanie, I promise to give you rides to school, just not all the time. I do have a life, you know."

Jeanie scoffed, putting her hands on her hips. "You think this car is yours? Ha! Why would mom and dad buy you a car? I'm the older twin."

Ferris's mouth moved but no words came out for a second. "BY TWO MINUTES! I've been asking for a car since I turned sixteen!"

"Uh, Ferris," Tom spoke, moving his camera away from his face to show a concerned look. "Jeanie gets the car. Your gift is inside the car."

Ferris took a deep breath as he peered into the window, half expecting a package of plain white socks to be sitting in the backseat, or some other equally as unenthralling gift, but was surprised to see an IBM PC XT computer box sitting on the seat. "Jeanie, unlock the car," Ferris sighed as Katie handed her the keys.

She turned the key in the front door lock and allowed Ferris to get inside to take his computer, which weighed a ton and a half, and he wondered how he was going to get it upstairs without breaking it. "Ferris, hurry up," Jeanie complained as she fiddled with all of the buttons and knobs on her dash from the front seat as Ferris struggled to lift his gift out.

"I'm trying. If you want it to go faster, maybe you should give me a hand," Ferris grunted, stepping back from the car and shutting the door with his hip.

"Be careful with my car! If you scratch it, I'll kill you!" Jeanie yelled from inside. Ferris rolled his eyes and staggered towards the house as Jeanie revved her engine in the driveway. That was supposed to be HIS car. He wanted a car, so why did he get a computer? Jeanie was the one who was adamant about going to college, so why not give her the computer?

Katie and Tom stood back, watching their kids go their separate ways with their gifts. "Do you think Ferris liked his computer?" Katie asked.

"Oh yeah, he loves it. He couldn't wait to take it upstairs," Tom replied, absentmindedly as he messed with his camera in the driveway.

Ferris managed to get his hunk of junk upstairs and onto his desk with a loud THUMP. He had to call Cameron. This was ridiculous.

He spun around in his swivel chair, phone up to his ear. "Cameron?" He asked, after hearing the line click.

"Yeah. Happy birthday," Cameron stated, before holding the phone away from him to cough.

"Thanks. It hasn't been that great."

"Why? Did your parents get divorced or something?" Cameron joked dryly.

"No, so stop making the same joke every time I call you. You know how I wanted a car?" Ferris asked.

"Yeah. Did you get one?" Cameron asked.

"No! Jeanie got it! She's a slimy witch. I don't know how she got the car! She didn't even care about one until today! I've been asking since sophomore year! Guess what I got instead, huh? Guess," Ferris ranted, pausing.

"A watch."

"No, I have one of those," Ferris rolled his eyes.

"A wallet."

"Do your parents only give you shitty stuff? No, I didn't get a wallet. I got a computer."

"What kind?" Cameron said. "Is it an IBM? Those are cool, cheaper, sure, but cool. Not as good as a Macintosh or an Amstrad-," Cameron rambled, and Ferris wondered how he knew so much about computers.

"Yeah, it's an IBM. Now shut up, and let me feel sad for myself because now I have to bum rides off of you and your shitty car for another year at least," Ferris complained.

"Or just use Jeanie's? And stop calling my car shitty, Ferris. It's really not that bad."

"Whatever you say. Now come pick me up and take me to dinner for my birthday. I need it," Ferris stated, glaring at the unopened computer box in front of him. Cameron sighed on the other line.

"I'm on my way."