Rules for Orion

chapter twenty-five

Twenty-five: Logan
October 3, 5:40 AM. Dwyer, VA.

He took the wrong shirt.
I've been left with good old Crisis Yellow, crumpled on my bedroom floor.
At least he's texted me. I'd thought he'd just left.

There's a twenty minute gap between that and the next message.

Could've woken me up. Told me he was leaving. But whatever.

I sit at my bed and stare out at the opposite wall. Then I fall onto my back, sigh a more tortured teenage sigh than I ever thought I was capable of, and stare at the ceiling. It's the same color as the wall.
I text Devi.

I don't want to think about it, but I keep doing it anyway.
I said I'd know. After it happened—so this begs the question: Is Logan Morcant abnormal and does he belong in a nunnery?
The answer: Logan Morcant doesn't have a God damn clue.
It's five forty-five. I have to get up in fifteen minutes. I kind of just want to sleep for a million years.

It wasn't a million years (unfortunately), but I did oversleep. It's three past seven when I wake up for real, meaning I only have twelve minutes to get driving. It's not realistic. I don't hurry.
My mom's gone like she is every morning, meaning my sister's already at the neighbor's house. (Our neighbor is kind of off-kilter, but she drives Lark to school with her own kids for free.) My dad's always asleep at this hour. Benefits of working from home, I guess.
I pour myself orange juice. I'd like to work from home, I think. I don't know what I'd do. My dad's got a PhD in linguistics, but he writes. I'm a shit writer—dyslexia and a complete lack of flow and vocabulary? I'd just end up writing down everything I thought. It'd be a pain in the neck to slog through.
Imagine me in a day job, though. God.
Maybe I'll just work at Target for the rest of my life. Take over for Meg when she retires.

    Crisis Yellow stares up at me from the floor. I know Devi's already going to be mad at me. You gave into pressure, she'll say. It's statutory.
Yeah, I've taken Health, Dev. A year in jail and twenty-five hundred bucks. I'm not going to fucking report him.
     I pull on Crisis Yellow and grab a sweatshirt.

    I get to school after first mod starts, so my fear of Devi waiting by my locker like a criminal in a dark alleyway is never realized.
     The fifty-something hall monitor outside the auditorium stares at me with rage in his eyes, but he looks at everyone like that. I slip into the chaotic Foundations of Technology classroom without many people noticing.

    As soon as the thirty minute free period starts, Devi texts me.

     I could just ignore it and go back to homeroom. I could also back out of everything and say I was sick. Go home.
     I could also just skip. I could just skip. I can walk out these doors, right now, and drive home.
     Well, not home. My dad's home. I'd go somewhere else.
     I could cover someone's shift at Target. Just to be nice.
     I could go to the boardwalk, even though it's too cold.
     I could go to the theater.

    When I'm in my car, I text Devi back.
I tell her I stayed home today.
Then I call Avery. He doesn't pick up.