Cursed To Live

Chapter 4

"I am doing what my heart tells me to." He answered smiling at me.
"What does your heart tell you?" I answered, not being able to process what had just happened.
"It tells me that I love you." He was looking straight into my eyes. Their green color made me feel like I was lost into an endless forest and I couldn't get out but at the same time they made me feel warm as if I could just stay there forever, as if that heat they made me feel would keep me safe, protect me.
"No you don't. You don't even know me. How can your heart tell you whatever about someone you don't even know?"
"I told you I know you."
"Stop! That's enough! You do not love me. Nobody does and nobody ever will." I answered, feeling the heat in my cheeks and the warm tears in my eyes.
"How can I prove that to you?" He asked me. His face was showing so many emotions - I could tell that he was concerned about something, but also his eyes were showing that he was sure of what he was saying, they were showing that he was telling the truth.
"What am I to you? Am I just a joke you and your friends are trying to make on me? Do you think I am the thrash everyone thinks I am?"
And then he didn't say anything. He just kissed me again but this time I didn't hold back. I wrapped my hands around his neck and started pulling him closer to me. I felt a tear dripping down my cheek and then falling on my leg. The wet spot was burning my skin as if it was warning me that I was making a mistake. But I couldn't hold back. I just wanted to feel loved. My own world collided with another one I did not know not did I understand - the cold world of hate and sadness colder with the warmth of the world of love, a world I wanted to discover every part of.
His lips were burning my skin, making me feel a new sensation I instantly fell in love with.
He broke the kiss and touched my wet cheek. My eyes were still closed.
"Why are you crying?" He asked and I opened my eyes.
"Because I know this is all a lie. Because I know you do not love me but my feelings are still pulling me towards you. That's why I'm crying." I answered, looking at my legs.
He just kissed my forehead and whispered.
"It is not."