Facing Reality

Chapter 4

A/N: Chapter 4! Okay I've gotta get working on the other chapters haha... Btw, anyone want to make a banner for this story? Just look at the cast I guess, and well yeah. Just put Violet and Ross :p Yeah thanks!

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After that encounter with 'Dr. Ross', or Ross I prefer to call him, I couldn't help but wonder about him. I constantly found myself replaying that night in my mind and what could have happened instead or what it could have meant. Also, I couldn't stop repeating Daniel's words in my mind. How he told me I was beautiful and his kiss, how genuine it was and how we just fell asleep next to each other. Then in the morning, when he woke up, made a run for his life and I watched him slip through my fingers. He was the only boy who's ever loved me and truly made me feel like a person who belonged. But he ruined it that morning. He was lying. He was just another one of those jerks who still call me troll.

On Sunday, after I'd slept through the entire Saturday, I finally came downstairs for something to eat and to clean myself up. If I hadn't been sleeping, I've been daydreaming, thinking how cruel this world is and how much better my own world within my mind is. 

I threw on a robe and headed to the kitchen when I saw my mom staring at me with eyes that filled with fiery rage, as if she would start screaming at me the instance she saw me. And to my luck, she did.

"What. The. Hell!" She yelled, raising her voice. I shrunk slowly in my robe and pretended to not me offended by anything she said. "Where were you all Thursday night and Friday morning? Over at a boy's house, getting knocked up? Doing drugs too maybe! And coming home with no shoes, smelling of liqour and not even saying a sorry to your mom? Who the hell do you think you are?!"

I drew in a sharp breath and tried to explain. "Mom, please, I'm tired of this world, of everything. Please just let me be..." I whispered hoping she'd hear.

"You think you're the only one with the problem here? You think this fucking world is only horrible to you? Do you know how devastated I have been these days, thinking that my daughter had run off with some people, done some illegal things, and then come home silently and think no one would care? Will that's bullshit! I want you to pull yourself together and get things straight! I also got a call from your school saying that you have not attended any classes and if you didn't soon, they'd expel you!" My mother snapped and I started feeling the tears build up. I hated when people yelled at me and beat me up with their words like they knew everything. I took another breath to stabilize myself and to back-up myself in this battle of me against the world.

"I've been keeping myself together for years! Picking myself up when people push me down! Do you know how much I've hated school? I've hated this life! You know why I'm always dazing off, avoiding you and I hate talking to people? Because I'm so wrapped up in my own world where people actually care about me! Did you know sometimes I could feel you resenting the fact that I was your daughter and just leaving me there to die! Truth be told is, I've been pulling myself together from falling apart my whole life now, without you, without dad, without friends or anyone! But I couldn't do that anymore so I just let go and let myself fall! I've been trying my whole life but all that happens is I get pushed down all over again...." I trailed off, now me and my mom both sobbing. I couldn't stand seeing her face so I ran out the door, eyes swollen, robe flying and slippers flopping behind me.

I only stopped when I reached the park once again, contemplating the thought that I could just let myself drown in the fountain alone, just like how my dad had wanted it. I was sobbing and my head started spinning as struggled to keep myself upright. I made it to the fountain and then I felt a hard impact on my head,