The Malec Chronicles

The Question

They are happy for the first time in months.

Right now, they are eating a candlelit dinner with food made by the Italian place on the corner, and they are eating holding hands even though it would be easier not to. Right now, there are smiles and laughter and easy conversation, and there is none of the tension or worry that hadn't left their faces since the whole Sebastian and Valentine fiasco started. Right now, neither of them are being haunted by the shadows of grief or pain or fear or nightmares. Tonight, there is no one else to invade on the little world they've made for themselves.

Except Alec isn't happy, not really. He's picking at his food, twisting the noodles around his fork without really eating them. He won't make eye contact, and he's not really talking like he normally does. There is no light in his eyes and no laughter in his voice, even when Magnus tells him a story he would have otherwise found funny. He jumps when Magnus takes his hand, and when the pause in the conversation goes on for too long, he tenses up, like he's bracing himself for something bad.

"Okay," He says finally, staring across the table at his incredibly jumpy boyfriend. "What's going on with you? Is it your dad again?"

"No," Alec waves the suggestion away like he couldn't even believe Magnus had thought it was okay to bring up. "No, I just need to talk to you about something."

"So talk." Magnus wonders vaguely if he's about to be broken up with, even after all that trouble they went through to actually get together. Even after all the late nights and I love you's. It is not a pleasant thought.

"You know how Shadowhunters normally take a trip around the world when they turn eighteen, visit other institutes?" Alec looks down at his plate when he talks, and he pulls his hand away from Magnus. "I was thinking of doing that."

"Oh." Magnus almost sighs, happy that this was all. Yes, he would miss him, and yes, he doesn't really think he wants to be apart from Alec for however long it takes him to visit every damn institute in the world, but he can't very well tell him to stay home. "You should. Go. Everyone needs to see the world."

"But I think I'm sick of Shadowhunters at the moment." It is a confession Magnus does not take lightly. Talk like this can only be had in the highest amount of secrecy, and with someone you trust completely. "We're kind of awful, really. And going around the rest of the world, only to find that they're all just as bad, I don't want that. So I was thinking to just go to all the tourist destinations, like a mundane, you know?" Alec looks up at him with pleading eyes, asking for Magnus to understand. "I know it's silly. I know it's selfish to want to run away. But I want to get away from all this."

"Don't be ridiculous Alexander." Magnus is already thinking of how long he will be away, of the phone conversations, of the possibility that once Alec sees the world there will be no need for him to return to this tiny little loft, once he's been exposed to all the bigger and better things that the world can offer him. "Everyone needs to travel at least once in their life."

"And I was thinking you could come with me, maybe?" Alec rushes out the words out so they're almost one syllable. He does not seem to be able to look at him. Magnus wonders how long he'd been thinking of this, how many times the words sat on the tip of his tongue ready to escape and he had to choke them back down because he was still able to doubt what Magnus feels for him, still able to think that Magnus would even consider saying no. "You don't have to, but I just thought..."

"Alexander." Magnus breathes out, happy and a little bit of awe. The relief fills him up and he laughs, so happy that he's not being left behind, that this boy, this man, really does love him and wants to see the world with him. He does not ever want this feeling to stop. "Of course I would. I'd go with you anywhere."