Junkertown Crisis

Chapter Five

I'm lucky enough to almost reach the city limits before Sombra tracks me down again. How she does it, I don't know, but I'll bet it's simple to pick out someone like me in a crowd. I wasn't really expecting to get far. But it's been less time than I imagined.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she shrieks, and she takes me firmly by the elbow, steering me in the other direction. I try to resist but lose my balance and decide it's better to come quietly than trip and fall.

"Escaping," I say. "Thought it was obvious."

"Do you want me to turn you in to the police?" She glares at me. "I thought you had at least a hint of intelligence left."

"What do you want from me?"

She blinks. "Excuse me?"

"You said you wanted information," I say. "And that's why you're following me, right? So what do you need?"

Sombra huffs a sigh. "I already found out all I need to know," she says, exasperated. "You talk in your sleep. Quite a lot."

With effort I yank my arm out of her grip. "Then leave me alone," I say. "I can take care of myself."

"Mako won't find you if you're wandering around," she says.

The words take me like punch to the gut. I splutter for a moment, unable to form coherent sounds.

"Yes, I know about Mako," she says. "And I know why he left in the first place."

"He left cause he's a git," I snap.

"Mmm... not really," Sombra says, cocking her head. "I can tell you. But not here."

"I'm not going all the way back to that place," I say.

"Of course not, Jamie." She gestures to a narrow alley just a street down. "Come on. It's more private in there."

"I ain't following you into a dark alley," I tell her. "No frickin' way. You're creepy enough as it is."

Sombra scoffs in exasperation. "Eres tan tonto! Why would I kill you after I went through so much effort to get you a surgeon?"

I shrug. "No idea, mate. No doubt you have your reasons."

"The only reason I have for killing you is that you're a goddamn idiot," she says through gritted teeth. "Fine. You want me to tell you here, in the middle of the street? Mako left because he cares about you. No, listen-" she says as I open my mouth to protest. "Do you know how old he is? He's nearly fifty. He's suffered consistent radiation poisoning for about a dozen years now. He's gonna kick the bucket, and he needs you to be able to handle yourself emotionally before he goes."

"Emotionally?" The twitch comes back but I ignore it. "Mate, I don't need emotional support."

Sombra plants hands on hips. "Well, that's clearly not true," she says. "Look at you. You walked barefoot for who knows how many miles on half a leg. Would you have done that if Mako had stayed? No."

"If he cared about me so much, why'd he leave in the first place?" I demand. "And what makes you think you know everythin' anyway?"

"I know," she says, "because I saw him. While you were unconscious."

I rub my twitching eye with my finger, trying desperately to get it to stop. "If you're gonna lie to me mate, at least make it believable."

"You know I'm telling the truth," she says. "He came and sat by your bed for almost two hours. I talked to him. He didn't say much, but he told me why he left. He said it's for your own good."

"Why should I believe you?"

"Oh, you don't have to," she says, eyes flashing angrily. "I just thought it'd bring you some comfort to know that. He didn't want me to tell you but frankly, that's his mistake."

I stare at her. So many thoughts are knocking around my head I can't focus on any of em. And then finally, the thought I least want to be heard forces its way out before I can stop it. "Is he alright?"

"He's a little sad," Sombra says. "But he's convinced he's done the right thing." She gives me a half smile. "Jamie, I know it's easier to lie to yourself, but those lies can hurt. Okay?"

I glare at the ground and say nothing.

"Please," she says, taking a step closer and looking up into my face. "Take care of yourself. For Mako's sake."

Without sparing a glance at her, I turn away and limp across the street. I'm expecting her to follow, but there's no footfalls behind and she doesn't call after me. And when I eventually look back, she's nowhere in sight.

My mind keeps her speech on repeat as I walk, and with each repeat I get a little madder. I can't shut out the image of Mako sitting beside my bed, watching me in my sleep, me weaker than I've ever been before.

Did he see me crying?

Idiot, I tell myself. He wasn't really there. Sombra's just trying to...

What?

What could Sombra possibly gain from all this?

I duck inside an abandoned building and find a corner to hide in. It's dark here, barely any light gets through the boards on the windows. I huddle up and lean my head against the wall. Funny, it just takes a week to go from carefree to panicking. Maybe I do need support.

I s'pose Mako was more than just a bodyguard. He always rested a hand on my back when I was anxious, too anxious to even get up, or when I was having flashbacks. And he'd wait for me to calm down. He made me eat when I didn't think I could go on. He knew exactly when I needed company and when I needed to be alone.

And I hated him for it.

It's my fault he left, really. I drove him off. He was the best thing that happened to me and I drove him off because I didn't understand what he was doing to me.

I try not to feel guilt, as a rule. Guilt gets you nowhere in this world. But when a wave of guilt rushes over me it's out of my power to stop it. I let it swallow me whole.

My only friend... and he's never coming back.

Does this hurt him as much as it hurts me? I picture him, sitting at a bar, trying to find an employer, and try to imagine what he's thinking.

But I can't. All I know is that he's gone, and I'll never get a chance to say I'm sorry.