seventeen oneshots

Icarus (meanie)

LINK:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11637291

Summary:

"Mingyu is gone."

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"Mingyu is gone."

For the last few nights, that's all that occupies Wonwoo's mind once the lights are turned off.

"Mingyu is gone."

Everything seems like a blur now, days going on and on while Wonwoo tries to keep going. He really is trying. Really. He tries.

"Mingyu is gone."

But how can someone live when half of them is gone, gone without even saying goodbye? When had things gotten so bad that Mingyu had to leave without even saying goodbye to Wonwoo?

"Mingyu is gone."

The words weren't even directed to him, a whispered tragedy shared between friends in a way too loud dinner that had become quiet way too abruptly. Wonwoo knows, he knows it was because he had been sitting right beside Jisoo. He knows the words had only been muttered after Jeonghan had asked about the puppy-like boy whereabouts. He knows he shouldn't have evesdropped because it was not his style, he would rather not spy any of his friends. But he swears, everyone in the stuffy room had been quiet and even if he hadn't wanted to hear, it was like his ears and his world turned his whole attention in anything that had to do with Mingyu. He knows it had been barely a whisper, but to him, it had felt like a screeching noise in his ears, the most defeaning sound he had ever heard in his 21 years of life. Only ever topped by the loud crash of his heart breaking after that statement had been done, a sound only ever audible to him. The worst kind of pain following right after.

-

Mingyu and Wonwoo were never meant to be, and the affirmation leaves a sour aftertaste in Wonwoo's mouth, like when you want to throw up and the bilis rises up to your mouth, but instead of spitting it out, you swallow it for God knows why. Even though, Wonwoo thinks that's for the better. He thinks, alone in his room, he thinks all the words he wants to actually spit in Mingyu's face. He thinks about all the times spent together. He remembers the first few sweet months and the thinks about the apocalyptic months that had led them to finally break up, breaking the other while at it. It hadn't been pretty. It had been quite a sight.

Wonwoo has always been more of a thinker.

And since the night he knew Mingyu was gone, all that he had done has been thinking in the darkness of his room.

There had been a time when his room hasn't been this pitch black, he thinks again while he lifts his hand up in the air, trying to figure it out in the whole darkness of his room, only knowing where it is because he has been the one putting it there anyway. A time back, even in the darkness, plastic stars and invented constellations filled his ceiling because once, Mingyu thought that would be romantic. It had been pretty romantic and that night was spent naming stars and constellations.

When Wonwoo looks up, his eyes go directly to the place where their own constellation had been once, before his blind rage agaisn't the other had led him to rip apart all of the stars, and with them, a bit of Mingyu's heart.

Still, Wonwoo thinks, it's not enough. Still, he is angry at the younger. Still, he thinks about all the words he still wished he had a chance to spit at Mingyu.

(But down deep his heart screams, "you would do anything to see him one more time, even if it's to scream bloody murder at him". He chooses to bury his heart with what he thinks are more rational thinking. Anyway, that what he is better t, isn't he?).