My dad was back. And I was back to catering to only Eli, throwing myself on the back burner like I always do. I called off of work three times since my fathers been back. I guess he wanted to make up for 'lost time'...
I continue to take Eli to school, feed him, do everything for him. He gives me attitude when I ignore his concerns. He even brings up Niall a couple of times asking if we 'broke up'.
I just told him that I wanted to focus on raising him, and it's true. I don't have time to 'love' somebody when I only have room for Eli right now. Plus I could never date someone and deal with what I deal with at home, it wouldn't be right.
I throw back another pain reliever and check the time, I have to pick up Eli in a little bit. I stretch out against the couch, my entire body aching, causing a tired groan to leave my lips. My hand lifts to my forehead, just above my eyebrow and I feel the scab forming already.
I pick at it slightly but decide its better to just leave it be, I didn't need more scars.
The silence of the house causes my ears to ring, my head pounding, and my eyes scattering across the room. I hated being alone.
Being alone meant drowning in my thoughts, my subconscious. I couldn't bare to listen to myself anytime soon.
I slowly get up from the couch and grab my shoes. I had to preoccupy my mind, focus on other things. Usually it's Eli but with him at school I have too much leeway.
My keys are in my hand before I know it and I'm making my way to my car. Maybe I can go grab some stuff for dinner, pasta. It was easy and pretty filling. Dad liked it.
The drive to the store is short and I feel like a walking corpse, my energy is in the negatives and I feel like I'm just existing. Not living.
Before I get out my car I remember to put my hat on and my sunglasses. I had to conceal myself as much as possible. I didn't need speculation from anybody.
I grab a shopping cart and slowly make my way through the mini mart, my eyes scanning the aisle names. Cereal. Sodas. Rice. Pasta.
I turn my cart into aisle 9 and look through all the pasta ingredients the store seems to carry.
I'm in deep contemplation when a voice startles me from behind.
"Noelle? Hey, long time no see." David says, he's in a white collared shirt. I give him a small smile and nod, feeling tiny in front of him. He looked so put together and I looked like this.
"Oh hey, David. Yeah, long time." I stumble over my words, not being able to stay calm. What if Niall is with him?
"Where you been? Samantha's been coming alone to the parties." He chuckles, his hands in his pockets and his head tilted slightly.
"Uh, just been busy... boxing, and taking care of my brother." I tell him, clenching my jaw once the words leave my mouth.
His mouth makes an 'O', "Explains the get-up?" He says tapping his finger on the brim of my baseball cap.
I let out a chuckle and nod. "Yeah, I'm not very good." I lie and he raises a brow.
"Well any girl that takes a beating like that in the ring is a winner in my books." He jokes and I give him a small smile. If only you knew..
"Thanks. It was good seeing you." I tell him, already wanting to leave the store empty handed, the last thing I needed was someone I knew seeing me like this.
"Yeah for sure, when are you going to come around again? Niall's boring now." He laughs and I try not to make it obvious that his name affects me the way it does.
