Memory Escape

Part 8

Of course he was in my head. He never left. Ever since that moment, the look in his eyes, the feeling of his arms, his warmth. It didn't leave my thoughts. I couldn't help myself. I wanted to forget the fact that he helped me. I wanted to forget the little I knew about him. But, the opposite happened. I was eager to know more about the mysterious Yoongi that helped a helpless girl in tears. The curiosity in my mind, it just grew and grew. I was unable to stop it. The more I pushed myself to forget him, the more my mind protested. But, why? Why can't he just leave me alone?

I'm starting to get desperate. Needy for his touch. I was completely captivated by the idea of him. I needed to see him again, in order to calm myself down. But, he probably doesn't want the same.

"I'll always be here, Nika."

I want to believe that. Unfortunately, something in me can't... 

"Nika! Go to the store and buy me milk and cheese!" my mom suddenly yelled

"Okay!" I said in response.

I, somehow, got up and quickly exited the house, grabbing my wallet in the process. My feet were fast, I wanted to do this quickly. My mind was overflowing and I just wanted to lay down, think. Luckily for me, the store wasn't far. The only catch was, the shortcut is through this old druggie park. Full of syringes, heroin packets, alcohol bottles... Disgusting.

Well, it's better than walking all the way around it. 

Hoping to get out of it fast, I was almost running. I hated it in here. You could never know when you could get jumped at by a drug addict. As always, it was dark because of the trees, despite the shining sun outside of it. Leaves and branches were scattered around, making every step very hearable. My heart was waiting for something, for a shock. I was expecting something to jump, I was scared. It looked like a scene from a horror movie. 

"All alone, the girl was eager to get out of the park. The end seemed so near, yet so far. Her eyes were looking for the one pitch of sunlight, signalising that this uncomfortable walk was over. But, nothing could be seen..."

I was picturing the horror movie in my head, wanting to amuse and distract myself from my surroundings. I was imagining all the scenes, lines...

"Nothing could be seen... Except for this one thing, that shocked her to the point of freezing."

"What is he doing here?" I whispered.

My brain stopped working, as my eyes were sucking in every detail of the scene I was looking at. Sitting on one of the benches, quite near me, was no other than Yoongi. He didn't spot me, luckily. He was playing with his fingers, curiously looking at them. 

I wanted to turn around and quietly leave, but my body didn't want to. There was a strong debate in my head. Should I walk, pretend like I don't know him? Or run away, like the coward I am? 

The devil and the angel, both on my shoulders, were fighting for dominance. I could just hear them. But, I didn't pay attention to it. My gaze was locked to Yoongi, who looked astonishing. His dark hair was messy, some pieces falling over his eyes. He was tapping his foot, nervously. He was wearing dark ripped jeans and a dark T-shirt, which just attracted me to him more. I couldn't even move an inch of my body. I was completely mesmerized.

"Go. He doesn't care about you, he won't even notice. Go. Come on. Show him that you can also be cold."

I mean, it's true. According to him, we don't know eachother. We are strangers. Why should I be scared? He won't even look at me, let alone say something. 

"Yes, good. Now go."

Like I was commanded, I started making little steps. My hands, I didn't know what to do with them. I quickly stuffed my pockets with them, wanting to look as careless as possible. My look was pointed towards the path in front of me, avoiding a milimeter of him. My small steps, turned into loud big ones. I wanted to show him that I, also, don't care. He helped me once, but he caught me off guard. I was in need of someone, anyone. I was desperate of a shoulder to cry on.

I didn't bother to look his way anymore. I kept repeating in my head to go quickly, and it'll be over. I didn't want to speak to him at all. If I did, I would most likely cry, again. Then, what would he think?

I nearly walked past him, when, unfortunately, fate turned against me.

"Nika?"

For a second, I stopped. I don't even know why. My body just stopped walking. It took me a moment to realize what I was doing, and I started to walk again. Now, even faster.

"Hey. Stop. Wait." he said.

Again, I stopped. He just had that control over me. Every word of his, every letter, charmed me. Every wish of his, I would kill to make true. I was under a trans, but I didn't want to wake up.

"I'm sorry, do we know eachother?" I said, while slowly turning to him with a light smile on my face.

He was no longer sitting. He was standing in front of me with a weird unreadable expression on his face. I kept my eyes onto him, struggling to keep the smile on my face. 

"I-I.. It's me. Yoongi." he said

You have some nerve...

"Oh, sorry. I don't know anyone named Yoongi. You must've mistaken me for someone else."

With that, I started to turn around, praying to God that he just leaves me alone. 

"Huh... come on. Stop acting like this."

But, of course...

"Listen, I don't know what you want from me. I don't know who you are."

"So you don't remember how you cried on my chest? You don't remember hugging me?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

Sure, Nika. You just try and believe that.

"Stop playing!" he yelled

"Playing?"

"Yes!"

His eyes filled with anger, as he started to come closer. You could obviously see how mad he was, since his chest was rising and falling at a drastic speed. To be honest, it made me happy. I felt satisfied with myself.

"The acts is over."

My thoughts were suddenly cut off, as my wrists were held by him tightly.

"What do you think you're doing?!"

"I want to talk."

"What is there to talk about? I don't know you!"

"Yeah, sure."

"Let. Me. Go!"

I tried to pull my wrists out of his grip, but failed. He just held them tighter. 

"Not if you won't listen."

"I don't want to talk to you! Who even are you?"

I wanted to push his buttons, to play. I wanted to drive him crazy. He needs to see what he did to me. How I felt. 

His eyes were pitch black. His neck was veiny, his teeth gritted hard. His jaw was sharply defined, due to the pressure. I just knew, it wasn't safe to play with this guy. But, damn, was it fun.

"You don't know me?" he said

"No!"

My heart was beating fast. Every breath I took, it was exhaled the next second. I couldn't contain myself. My head was all over the place, as I kept starring into his eyes. They scared me more that this damned park. I wanted out. I wanted him off. But, at the same time, I wanted to stay like this forever. No matter the situation, his touch was all I needed. 

Suddenly, all of my thoughts just disappeared, and my heart stopped.

He kissed me.