Our ANZAC In The Attic

• Chapter 16 •

{ Eli Shearer }
"Dear Shearer, your son is so much like you it isn't funny. He even has exactly the same sleep pattern as you. Wake up at 11, then again at 3 then again at 6. He's always so happy, smiling and giggling at silly little things. It's hard to put into words how things have changed. I just want him to meet you so much, I miss you so much, I can't explain it. Everyday I pray you'll knock on the door and I'll be able to show off our little boy to his daddy. I can't wait to marry you. Yesterday, I took Ali to the post office in the big pram your mother gave me, I do not want you to worry or anything but there are new people in town and I don't think they enjoy the company of New Zealanders with an aboriginal baby. Anyway, just hang in there for the both of us. I love you so much, love your Lucy and baby Alistair." I read out loud to Elouise.
"She's so lost without him," she murmured studying a photograph.
"She's doing alright," I said. Elouise opened up Lucy's diary.
"August 1st, dear Diary, every one has their bad days and for me today was particularly awful......
______
{ Lucy Hamilton }
I had been given a perambulator by Mrs Shearer because carrying Alistair was beginning to get harder as he grew bigger.
"It that nice? Yeah?" I tucked in the rug as the baby clapped. I smiled down at my happy little boy, "I love you baby yes I do, I love you so, so much," I kissed his little nose lightly, before pulling away and focusing on his big brown eyes. "C'mon lets go see auntie Cass," I chuckled as I pushed the heavy pram out the door.
"Hey Luce! How are you!?" Cassie ran over and gave me a much needed hug.
"Yeah alright mate," I stated informally. A woman who looked like she was quite well off stood at the post office door glaring at me like I was somewhat of a peasant.
"Good morning Lucy! Cassidy! Oh and of course baby Alistair," Mrs Slater smiled waving from behind her desk.
"Good morning Mrs Slater," we chorused in unison, causing her to laugh.
"I think I saw a letter from Shearer this morning Luce," I felt my heart skip a beat as she spoke. A grin spread across my face as I lifted my baby into my arms. "That's brilliant, has made my bloody day," I stepping inside.
"Um excuse me, I was here first, you obviously have not been taught manners," the woman spoke precisely and her tone caused me to look up with furrowed eyebrows.
"Oh I apologise ma'am," I said, grabbing Alistair's hand that was pulling my hair as he squealed.
"Now please silence that baby, I have had an awful night, my nephew left to Gallipoli about a week ago and I'm expecting a letter," the woman glared at me again. I cocked an eyebrow in confusion. How could someone be so self centred?
"Excuse me? Your nephew?" I questioned.
"Yes my nephew, I hadn't seen him in a while now he's going to Gallipoli, I live alone which is something I'd rather but he just grew up so quickly," she started to get emotional.
I tilted my head to Cassie and she just shook hers.
"Fair enough," I chewed my lip slightly. The whole room fell silent, even Alistair stopped. Then the woman said this;
"You must get some filthy looks, walking around without a ring on your finger and carrying a black child," she waved a boney finger at me.
I couldn't breathe, I mean I was speechless, it felt like a dagger had been driven straight into my chest. I let out a heavy gasp, that I didn't realise I was holding.
"Um, well yes occasionally I do, but-"
"Luce you don't have to," Cassie started.
"No let me speak, my fiancé left before I found out about Alistair, he has been on Gallipoli since the 25th of April, in fact he was the first battalion to land there, he has never met his son, and yes they're indigenous Australian but he is the most remarkable man I have ever had the pleasure of knowing, he is a sniper and risks his life everyday so the country that you and I live in can be prosperous and free, my son is the only thing keeping me alive and you're crying because your nephew who you haven't seen in what? 16 years? Has gone to war, I haven't seen Shearer since September or something and I wake up every morning preparing for a telegram to get delivered to my door. You can't tell me you're hurting because I can guarantee you have never looked into your sons eyes and wept because all you want is for him to see his dad, I don't mind you going in front of me in the line but I don't have time for people better off than me telling me that carrying my son is wrong, believe me I'll be the first person to tell you that Ali wasn't planned, but I had this baby for a reason and Shearer and I know that this baby is going to be the most loved child in the world," I swallowed hard, knowing I was getting slightly off topic. Cassie's, Mrs Slater's and Alistair's eyes were quite big but the woman before me stood stiff, her face pale and tears dripping down her face.
"I am so sorry," she said before walking out and closing the door behind her.
"Miss Francis your mail!" Mrs Slater called but 'miss Francis' was gone.
"Brave woman," I stated.
"What are you talking about?" Cassie asked taking Alistair from me.
"What she said to me, that takes guts," I nodded picking up my mail.
Mrs Slater and Cassie laughed heartily, "God I miss him," I sighed.
"Daaaa," Alistair gurgled and my heart ached.
"He'll see us soon," I cried, tickling his chest.
__
{ Elouise Green }
"Cassie came home with us, she was in desperate need for a chat, so was I. Cassie did most of the talking though, she was in need of Ollie just as much as I was Shearer. I miss a lot of things and dear diary I'm sure you're sick of hearing me say so, maybe I'll start talking about what there is to look forward to. We'll see, you're sincerely Lucy," I looked up at Eli, he was twiddling his fingers.
"You ok?" I asked softly.
"My mother is half-cast if you even say that and dad was full aboriginal, I was a dark baby still am, my mum copped so much when we were little kids, in this day in age, it didn't really click in my head that she did until reading this," he explained. I curled my lips in, in sympathy. Eli rose to his feet suddenly, making me jump a little and he bolted to the phone.
-
{ Eli Shearer }
I dialled my old family home in Burra.
As it dialled in, Elouise put her arms around my waist. 
"Hello Kylie Shearer speaking," my mother's voice was soft and comforting.
"G'day Mum its Eli," I said.
"Hey baby, how are you," she asked.
"I'm well, Mum I'm sorry," I shuddered.
"What for bub?" she sounded confused.
"I'm sorry for everything you have to put up with, I'm sorry that you went through all that you had to while dad was away, I'm sorry that you had to put up with people in the street, I'm sorry," I sniffed back my tears. The line was quiet for a few seconds.
"Bub you don't think I prepared for that? I wanted you to more than anything else in the world, parading my babies around was what I wanted to do, I loved you from the moment I found out I was having you, when you're a dad you'll understand how amazing it is to have a little person like you, what bought this on baby?" she explained, her voice still sounding oddly confused.
"Lou and I are reading about a lady who's husband is at war and he's aboriginal and she has their baby and how she's being spoken to is unbelievable," I felt a tear escape my eye.
"Yea bub it's not nice at all but you have to be able to learn to accept who you are, I wanted you two, I didn't care who called me what or even what they said because I was proud of my two little dark babies and I knew you'd turn out alright," she chuckled as she spoke, the pride behind her words made me realise that mothers love their children through the names, the stares and the arguments. They love their daughters imperfections and their sons crazy ideas, they hang onto every word they say even when they don't want to listen, they adore their children no matter what other people or themselves say.