You Make My Life Complete (Boyxboy)

Chapter 9

Riley's POV

I walked into my house shivering and wet. I had spent most of yesterday on my rock, sketching and thinking. That is, until I fell asleep. I woke up only feeling as if the weight of the pain and loneliness I had been feeling for months was crushing me even more than before. I knew seeing my brother and not being able to hug him would just shatter me so, I stayed on my rock as long as I could. 

As I entered the house, I stayed quiet, hoping to avoid my brother. My hopes were dashed when he quickly strode into the room. My expression hardened, almost out of habit, as soon as I saw him. 

"Where the hell were you?" He asked as Jay followed behind him, holding Spencer.

"Nowhere." I muttered, trying to push past him. 

"Nowhere?" He repeated angrily. "Riley, you've been gone for over 24 hours!"

"Ever think that's because I don't want to be here?" I asked, a ring of truth resounding through the sentence. I did hate it here. I hated having to watch Levi and Spencer, not being able to be a family with them. I hated what I felt when I was here. 

But as I watched his face change expressions, my heart squeezed. I saw as the anger disappeared, shock and hurt taking its place. 

"Then leave." He said, his voice emotionless. "If you don't want to be here, then you can just go. I'm done."

As he turned and scaled the stairs, I felt everything come crashing down around me. I had finally succeeded. He hated me. But now, feeling it, I didn't think I could handle it. 

The lump in my throat was quickly becoming too much to handle and when I glanced at Jay, seeing his disappointed expression, the mask broke. I sprinted up the two sets of stairs to my room as the dam broke. 

By the time I had gotten to my room, I was in full sobs. The feelings that had been weighing me down were now crushing me, destroying me. I gripped my hair as I tried to breathe through the sobs rocking through my body. My legs gave out from under me and I landed on my knees on the floor beside my bed. My breathing came out in harsh gasps and my chest felt like it was caving in. 

A hand on my shoulder made my head shoot up and I was looking into Jay's green eyes, tinged with sadness and worry. He knelt down on the ground next to me with Spencer still in his arms. Spencer squirmed in Jay's arms until he let go. He crawled away from Jay and into my lap before speaking, "No cry, bubba."

I wrapped an arm around his back and let out a choked laugh when he swiped his hand down my face in an effort to wipe away my tears. With him in my arms, I moved to sit and rest my back on the bed frame. Jay mirrored my movements.

"You need to tell him."Jay said quietly after giving me a moment to calm down a little. "You need to be honest with him. It's hurting you both too much."

I didn't look at him. I didn't know how to respond or what to do. I wanted to be close with my brother again but I didn't want to hurt him the way our mom, dad, and Cam did. 

"I don't know if you heard him but he was sobbing, Riley. He loves you and he needs you, just like you need him." He said and I could feel his hand gripping my shoulder, trying to pass me some comfort.

"No, he hates me." I said thickly. I had now caught my breath and was left with just a slow stream of tears still tracing their way down my cheeks. "He kicked me out. He never wants to see me again." My heart clenched painfully as I spoke. 

"He could never hate you. He loves you and he just wants you to be happy. Trust me. I know what it's like when you're not loved by your family and Levi is far from it." He said seriously.