Only him. Ivan Martinez x reader

Charpter 16

Your point of view
I hate how I keep doing this to Ivan,he deserves so much.Why does he want to be with  me,I get hurt and traced no matter where I go.I wish I could control it......but I can't.
Y: its not your fault
I: yes it is
Y: don't say that
I held on to his hand.he cant blame himself because I was wandering off ........ I feel something with Ivan. I can't believe that he is the way he is.When I am around him and I feel butterflies everwhere. I can't imagine life having joy with out him,he saved me from my dad and has seen some of my many flaws but still is around.....
But yet I feel like I might lose it all and be on floor with my heart in pieces ,I mean i haven't know him for that long .I fell asleep deep in thought and started to go back to my memory's with my dad,and I couldn't stop crying,and I didn't know if it was in my dream or if I was actually crying.But I felt the pain.

Ivan's point of view
I was sitting beside her holding her hand when she startled to hold on tighter and I saw tears I tryed to wake her up.
I:y/n are you ok,ba-y/n what's wrong?!
Y:(looks at him with tears in your eyes)
I:come here
I held her tight and couldn't let go.when I asked her what was wrong she just shook her head.Seeing her like this broke my heart.

Going in and editing