Praying mantis' madness

no, not you again.

It's a late afternoon, I'm in my studio looking at the paper where I'm trying to write some lyrics for my new album, I think I'll start talking about the hurting. My shoulders are rested over the wall, there aren't any windows in the studio so I don't know what time is it and even less what kind of weather there is outside. I always like to compare my studio to the inside of me, darkness and timeless. It isn't a place where you can stay more than sometimes a bit like my heart, not cozy. The studio is far away from home, but I don't complain I love it. The walls are black, as everything here, the floor is rough made with moquette. The walls are soundproof so my art can stay between these walls and me. On the walls you can find some pictures of my favorite artists most of them are latinos but you can find some American artist too, when I chose to be a singer I wanted to do my best not only to make money but to be one of those artists that your country is proud of. The studio became my second home, I spend a lot of time there for me it is like a warm place during winter, a warm place where my cold heart can melt just a bit, anyways today I can't spend a lot of time there because tonight I have to go to Dinah's party and I still didn't get her a gift, I need to hurry up. It's 3:45pm and I'm going to eat something, I go into the first place I see and I take a Cesar salad, my favorite. It's 4:15pm and I'm here in a store trying to buy something for Dinah, also if she's my best friend and I should even know how many moles she has, don't worry I know it, when it comes to gifts for her I always panic and don't know what to get her. I heard she's going out with a nice man so I point in something sexy and red, I will go for lace underwear and bra from Victoria's secret, as a gay woman I know how much we, women lovers, love these kind of things. I know the feeling I have when a hot woman in front of me wears sexy underwear, I feel energy in my hands and I want rip them out so much, I don't care how much I paid it. When I go to pay I see this hot girl winking at me and I think that I still have 5 hours until Dinah's party so I asked her if she's gonna end her shift soon, she says that in 10 minutes she'll be out. I take her to this fancy place, she's one of those girls who doesn't stop talking and to be honest I'm that kind of person who doesn't want to hear I already have my problems I don't need to hear others. So I took the occasion and I kiss her and kiss after kiss we end up making out in a taxi going to her house. This time I don't want to play my game I just want to fuck her. We did it, she was really good and I think it was good to give her my number so I did, but after i did i ran away not because I didn't want to have sex again but because its 7:50pm and Dinah's party start at 9:00 pm. 

It's 9:10 pm and I'm late I already know Dinah will throw shade all night because it, the weather is nice not too hot I think while I open the door of the pub she chose to party. I go into the pub looking for new faces, it is one of those places where it is always full of people so I have trouble to pass between them, I already know this place it is one of her favorites, at the walls there are old posters of beers and singers, this place is also famous because a lot of single girls looking for fun come, so I love this place. It doesn't seem like a place where single people go but it actually is, the tables are made for 20 people but there are few of them in fact a lot of people stay up with the beer in their hands. I can see a curtain in the local, men single from one side and women from another, you can count on your fingers married people and I know I'm not the only one who just noticed it, there are so many different people in this pub from the hippies to the people who buy only expensive things, because sadly a lot of women still look at his wallet before his face. I'm one of those people who is well dressed with big brands but only people that know more can see it because I don't go around with logos on my things, every time I'm here I take home some girls so yeah I'm glad Dinah chose this place. I see Dinah in a corner but instead of going to her passing between a lot of bodies I go to the bar and I take my favorite beer, ceres, and a sex on the bitch for Dinah I know is her favorite. While I wait for her cocktail I look at the group that D invited, I can see some girls from high school, like Ally one of our best friends at that time, she's always been so nice and cute I heard she is a teacher and I think that fits her a lot, she is one of those girls who is just "made for it" some co-workers like Chloe, Ryan and Nancy and some extra people that I don't know 5 women and 7 men, about the men I could care less but about the vaginas having people I do a lot, I check them out, one is talking with the birthday girl she's cute but I would love to see how her body is since she hides it under the table, one is standing up she seems to have an amazing body and amazing lips, only god knows the fetish I have for women lips, the other 3 seem pretty normal girls nothing special but also not ugly at all. while I was checking them I hear Dinah yelling something that I can't hear because the amount of people that divide us but with the hand she's saying that I have to come here. I remember once a girl told me how the brain of a single person works, there are 2 phases:

The first one is try to approach a woman and telling her or even making her a speech about the fact that you hate relationships and you just want to have fun and a lot of sex, so in some kind of why you already try to make run away these kind of girls. the second one is kinda the opposite you hear them and try to make a decision about if they are worth it to keep seeing and meeting or if they are just a waste of time, the problem of the second choice is that you have to think with your brain and not your pussy. Now this girl which honestly I don't remember her name is married so you can assume which decision she took. Anyways I won't use any of them I mean maybe the first one sometimes, but for me I think they have to invent a new one the 3rd, making them believe you want them but end up hurting them. I go to Dinah with her drink in one hand and my beer in the other while I'm there I am greeted with a lot of " hey how are u doing? It's a long time since I've seen you? Everything ok?". I can see a chair with a jacket on it so it means there is still a woman that I have to meet. I give Dinah her cocktail and she smiles at me, I already can feel she's tipsy. I give her the gift and she smiles again "thanks Camila I can't wait to open it" while she says that she takes a chair and put it between her and the mysterious girl, while I'm turning behind to sit I see those emerald eyes looking at me I can feel the air becoming heavy and my heart in my throat going down in my stomach, I can't believe Dinah invited her I bet it was one of her ideas to make me heal from my pressed broken heart, when we're alone at home she's gonna get it . "Hi Camila, its so nice to see you again without you running away scared" oh wow now she's even try to be funny I look at her and it is just 9:20 pm and I already can't stand her and this party, while I turn around to take my beer I see Dinah with a eyebrow raised like she was asking questions not knowing what happened days before "yea I know right?" I say with bitter and harsh on my words towards Lauren taking my sit and making it closer to Dinah's seat, D at the same time tries to push me into Lauren but I resist, "you gonna pay for this Dinah why did you invite her?" I say yelling whispering "me inviting her? Never Camila don't be silly!" I can feel she's playing the victim. I am not in the mood to stay next the girl who broke my heart so much and made become who I am so I get up and try to go to the other side of the pub to meet some hot girls, I start to speak with 2 blondes but while I'm trying to flirt I keep feeling some eyes on me, I turn around and she's watching me. The stare is so intense I can't even focus on what I'm saying so I decide to leave these blondes to go talk with Lauren.

"Can we talk for a moment?" I ask in a rude way to Lauren

"sure, if you are not so busy with those blondes" she says in a sassy way, we go outside it is cold but I don't care my anger makes me feel so hot or maybe its the alcohol I keep drinking to forget her presence here at this party. "what do you want Lauren? Why were you watching me???" I ask yelling in her face, I don't care if she will see me as a crazy one I don't care I have questions and I need answer. I can see she's laughing at me "there is no need to act in this way Camila, chill " she says "yea and there was a need to treat me and act like 6 year old after you took my virginity?" she doesn't smile anymore she even looks sad.

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Hi guys hope you are enjoying this fanfic as i enjoy writing it! thanks for 1k wow