The Lake House

Chapter 8: "Where does that leave us?"

Chloe's POV

"How're you doing Chlo?" Ashton asks, slowly walking into my room. He cautiously handed me a cup of tea. "I heard this thing is supposed to make you feel better."

I sit up to take the cup, "thanks."

That was one of the most sarcastic thing I've said in my life. But I don't really care right now since I'm mentally dead. I think I'm mad? I can't tell. I'm just... Confused. Utterly confused.

"Shawn's downstairs if you want to see him," Ash speaks. I shake my head as he slightly frowns. "You've got to talk to him at some point."

"Not today Ash, I need more time," I respond as he shows no emotion. "If he cares enough, he would understand."

He sighs, "he does understand. But you have to understand that he went through all this by himself. It was the most hardest thing he had to go through."

"Don't you think I know that?" I argue. "It's not my fault that mom and dad died the same day and I blacked out and lost my memories."

Ashton took that as a cue to leave my room. I still can't believe no one told me about any of this. Not even a subtle hint. Bonnie... I can't believe Bonnie didn't tell me any part of this. And to think she was my best friend.

I stopped talking in my head and decided to write everything that I felt. I grabbed my journal underneath the mattress and opened up to the next blank page.

Life is hard.

That was the only thing I could think of. In all of my years of journaling, this is the first time that I can't write anything down. My head wants to explode with emotions but my hand just can't seem to write anything.

I wish my mom and dad were here to help me through this. I had a child. I was a mother at some point. And Shawn was the father. We were so young yet I had a miscarriage.

I can't seem to say that out loud. It has become the one thing I fear the most. But what would've happened if I didn't lose my baby?

Would I have been a good mother? Would Shawn and I be happy with keeping the baby? Would Shawn be where he is today? I have no idea. But this was the past. And now all my memories of Shawn are flooding back.

Of everything that's happened in my life, meeting Shawn has to be the best thing to occur. Sure I've had some crappy bumps along the way but look at Shawn. Look at where he is today even with everything that happened.

If we've been together for this long, my parent's death would've affected him. And this baby must've hit him hard but he pushed through it. He became stronger, mentally and physically. I wonder what kept him sane. Because as of right now, he's a true hero to me.

My phone on the nightstand buzzed so I checked it.

Shawn
I know you have a lot on your mind but please meet me outside. I want to take you somewhere.

I set the phone down before taking a deep breath. Ash is right. I have to talk to Shawn about this. He went through this alone and I can't be selfish. Especially not with him.

I slide my boots on before running downstairs and heading outside. Shawn was leaning against his truck, typing away on his phone. When he saw me, he gave me his gorgeous smile that I swear could make my heart warm every time.

"Thank you for meeting me," he says. I walk closer to him and end up giving him a huge hug. I heard him chuckle before hugging me back. "What's this for?"

"I think we both could use a hug right now," I explain as I nuzzle into him. Even though it's still winter and it's freaking cold as heck, he makes me warm. He makes me happy.