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abiFAIL: there's always more than meets the eye
*The day before Abigail's birthday*
Abigail was awake extremely early and she was sitting outside on the roof of their house. She is able to get out through her bedroom window, but there is an easier way of getting up along the side of the house. She had made herself a large cup of coffee and she was waiting for the sun to rise. Seeing all of the colors begin to appear was making her love living along the beach.
IMessage: Michael Conor: don't fall Abigail: thanks for the tip. I'll consider it Abigail: since your awake come on up
She saw Michael who was sitting on his porch get up and walk over to the side of her house. She pointed down at the indents in the bricks and told him to climb up by stepping on the tall garbage cans to keep his balance. Once he climbed up he came and sat down next to Abigail.
"What are you doing up here?" Michael asked
"Sitting, breathing, thinking, watching the sky turn different colors"
"Early mornings are my favorite thing in the entire world" Michael said looking up at the sun beginning to rise above the horizon
"Why's that?" Abigail asked taking another sip of her coffee
"Because it feels like the rest of the world is still fast asleep and you're the only one who's awake. And just by looking out into the distance your able to forget about all your problems because just for a short amount of time it's just you, the world, and the sunrise"
"Wow, I didn't know you were that deep" Abigail said sounding intrigued
"Alright well sitting and breathing I can obviously see you doing" he said crossing his legs and turning to face Abigail more. "But what are you thinking about up here? and why are you just watching the sky turn different colors?" he asked
"Your just full of questions aren't you" she joked beginning to answer his questions. "Well I'm out here thinking about life and I love sunrises because it's like God is this incredibly talented artist and out entire world is just his canvas. Yet he changes the creation each and every morning"
Michael then playfully and sarcastically coughed into his sleeve and whispered "Someone is trying to sound more deep than me"
They both started to laugh.
The two continued to talk about their enjoyments of early mornings. It was so early that Ariana wouldn't even be close to being awake yet. She could sleep in until after noon if she didn't have Abigail pounding on her door each and every morning to wake her up.
"So why are you thinking about life?" he asked as quickly as the words would come out of his mouth
"What?" she asked
"Before you said that you were thinking about life....."
Abigail began to feel her body tense up. The part of her life that she was thinking about included Michael except she didn't want to tell him that. She didn't want to tell anyone that. The only ever time she has every brought it up was when she was writing all of it in her journal, except writing doesn't count as talking about it.
She thought of the first thing that came into her mind and said "well trying to balance a job and not being able to see my best friend all the time is kind of hard"
"I get that. I left all my best friends behind when I moved out here with my cousins. Once I realized that even if I don't win this show I don't plan on going home so my girlfriend and I broke up before I left"
"I'm so sorry" Abigail said
"I knew I had to make a choice for my life. It was a hard choice, but I realized if I wanted to follow my dreams and execute my own destiny I know I had to make a difficult choice"
"Wow, all I wanted to do was runaway to California"
"Why'd you want to runaway?" Michael asked
"I lost my parents, my brother is a workaholic, and I knew that I wouldn't be successful in New York so my best friend and I came to a place far far away"
Abigail and Michael continued to talk for a while until the sun was fully up. The sky had went from beautiful cotton candy colors to turning a light blue color for the rest of the day.
IMessage: Lukas: I won't be able to call you tomorrow Lukas: So I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday little sister Abigail: Thanks Lukas!! I love you big brother
They stayed on the roof for a few more hours talking to one another. It was every personal conversation that related to family, relationships, and dreams. Then transferred to unrelated conversations about Michael's new show and how he got into singing and rapping. Abigail felt at peace when she was talking to Michael. She felt that she could truly open up to him about things in her life, yet she held back on a few of the major details.
"What are you doing up here?" Ariana asked popping her head onto the roof from Abigail's bedroom. "I've been looking for you throughout the whole house. I literally thought you were freaking kidnapped in your room last night"
"Nope, I'm good"
"Have you been up all morning?" Ariana asked
"Yeah I came up to watch the sunrise this morning. Then my friend came up with me to watch for a few minutes"
"Oh well hey I'm Ariana by the way" Ariana said not acknowledging Michael at first but then being forced to. "You've been up here for a while damn"
"What time is it?" she asked noticing that her phone was shut off. As she was waiting for it to turn back on
Ariana said "It's already almost noon"
"Wow, we've been up here for hours" Michael said beginning to carefully stand up on the roof of the house. "I should get back before my cousins send out a search party for me" he said beginning to go back down the way he came up. "It was good meeting you Ariana"
Ariana waited a minute or two as he was going down and then back to his house. She looked over the side and saw he was finally gone and then she said "Who the hell was that?"
"That was my FRIEND Michael" she said emphasizing the word friend because she knew Ariana would understand the concept of what was going on in Abigail's mind right now
"Okay....." she said placing her hands in the air surrendering to the conversation and then leaving to go back in the face
Abigail was now alone again on the roof. She just kept sitting there until she knew Ariana had gone back into the house. She didn't understand any of the emotions that she was really right now. She just kept replaying hers and Michael's conversation together.
It wasn't until she took out her journal and simple wrote:
