PS. I'm Still Here

Part 2: 31.

     "Cas?"

     Castiel nods. "It's me." He reaches out for Dean hesitantly and Dean flinches away shaking his head. He thinks about how long he's been imagining this moment with Castiel and how he wishes it could be different. 

     "How long have you known who I was?" Dean whispers not making eye contact with him. 

     "A little over a week..." Castiel says.

     "I-" Dean starts. "I can't do this right now." He turns and walks away from him towards his car. He gets in his car and bangs on the steering wheel just starting to cry. Everything hits him all at once and he realizes that Grace, his best friend in high school and his ex girlfriend, is dead. Sure they haven't talked in a year but he always figured that they would eventually reconnect in a couple years after they got past the fact that they broke up. Dean drives off campus and goes to the nearby park. There's no one there since its still before noon and it's a rainy day. He sits on the bench alone just thinking about Grace. He sits there thinking for a couple minutes until he starts crying again and stands up. He's startled when he feels someone touch his shoulder. He turns around to see Castiel.

     "You know," he sniffles. "Usually when someone drives away it means they want some space. What are you doing here?"

     "I followed you..." Castiel says softly.

     "You followed me?" he says angrily then sighs. "You followed me...Cas, my friend...my ex girlfriend...she turned up dead today. I don't have time to be angry with you right now." He looks at him realizing how close he is to the person he's been trying to find for a month.

     "Then, don't be angry with me. Just...let me comfort you. Please Dean," he whispers.

     Dean sits on the bench slowly and nods as tears start to form again. Castiel pulls Dean to he chest and rubs his back slowly. They stay like that for awhile until Dean stops cry and he starts telling Castiel stories about fun things him and Grace used to do in high school. They talk for an hour until there's a break in conversation and Castiel digs Dean's phone out of his pocket. "Here, you dropped this."

     Dean nods. "Yeah, thanks. I forgot about that. Listen, we really need to talk...just not today. I can't talk about anything to do with us today. Tomorrow though...I want to talk tomorrow. Can we...do that?"

     "Yes, of course. Whenever you want. Just...send me a message and we can meet wherever."

     "Alright," he says and gets up to walk back to his car. "And Cas?"

     "Yes?" Castiel says looking over at him.

     "Thank you."