Chapter 3

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Ella

I know. Me too.

I read those four words, and anger pours out of me. My skin feels red-hot, my eyes burning.

How dare someone write on the letter that was supposed to be for my mum, not anyone else. How can someone think they share the same pain as I do? They wrote the words 'I know' .  But they DON'T know. They don't know anything about me, or what my life is like.

Wait. 

How long ago did this person write this?

I look around frantically, half-wishing to see a suspicious-looking person so I can pay them out right now, half-wishing that I don't because I might just explode. 

Thankfully, I don't see anyone in sight. 

Except Barry. But he's always here. Cleaning up the dead flowers that people leave behind. The letters that I write. 

It's not him, is it? 

No, no. It can't be. He's forty-something and looks like about the happiest person I know. And you gotta give him some credit. I mean, he works in a cemetery. 

I almost go up to him and complain, but I think of my mum. Of what she would say. 

Be kind, Ella. Only kind. 

I pull out my pen and start writing. To this random boy. 

Boy? Girl?

I'm almost sure it's a boy. I can tell from the shaky, sloppy writing.

After I write back, I leave without even writing anything to my mother.

I don't realise until I'm home and in bed. 

I've talked -no, written- to her every day. Except for today. Because I let some stupid boy get in the way of my dead mother. 

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