The Book of Lies Park Chanyeol Tells You

lie 7

lie 7
"I'm fine."

•Park Yu Na's POV•

This lie is again from me.

We both told this lie.

I'm fine.

The most famous lie of all.

I'd never thought I'd say this as a lie, but after you, I suspected it.

If you ask me how I am, I'll say that I'm fine. Not depressed, broken, and empty like I actually am and not happy, good, and great like I used to be. Just fine.

I used to talk all the time, but now I'm silent.

My silence is a scream for help.

Me saying that I'm fine is one too.

I'm fine means save me.

I'm fine means I'm not telling you something.

I'm fine means I'm hiding all my feelings so you won't we concerned, but who said you were gonna be anyways.

I keep saying I wish and I want to you, Chanyeol.

Why can't you ever make me say "I have"?

I have an amazing boyfriend who wouldn't ever lie or cheat. That's what I want to say and that's what everyone thinks.

What I really say is something you don't wanna hear, but I'm gonna tell you anyways.

I had a boyfriend who I loved with all my heart and who completely shattered it. A boyfriend who I couldn't trust. A boyfriend who didn't love me as much I loved him. A boyfriend who I found out cheated on me with a fucking guy.

That's what I want to say, but I care too much about you to ever say it.

But why should I care, when you don't?

Why do I love you, when you don't love me?

Why do I miss you when you don't miss me?

Why did I have to fall in love with you?

I hate feelings. I don't want to feel anymore.

I can't do this.

•Park Chanyeol's POV•
*irl*

"I love you," I said while I watched you writing in this book from my window,"but I can't be with you."

I was a fool and I'm sorry, Yuna.

I know you're writing about me.

I saw her put down the book and start to cry.

I tried to reach for her, but the window and everything else was in the way.

I hated seeing her cry, but I saw her cry everyday. It made me want to cry and sometimes I did.

I wish I could sing to her like I used to when she was sad.

But I can't. I know I hurt her. I know I'm stupid, but I can't do this to her.

I can't let my toxic personality spread to Yuna.

But I can't let you go, Yuna.

You shouldn't be with me. Be with Kai or anyone else. Just not me. I'm not good for you.

You deserve better and I've hurt you enough.

Please stop crying, Yuna.

I saw her grab her book again and continue writing.

Creds to justmetonita1 for the Chanbaek idea.