How To Heal A Broken Heart

Dreams of A Five Year Old

Dreams of A Five Year Old

If she closes her eyes, she can see herself as a young girl smiling, running after her older brother. She can hear her laugh as her brother tackles her to the ground and tickles her. She sees the love she had for him and he for her. Her memories have reverted her and her brother to the siblings they were before the tragedy occured and the hatred began to surface in both their hearts.

She a young girl of five follows her brother where ever he goes because she feels safe with him. He is her knight in shining armor, her protector, and her brother. He's the one who promises to look after her, to always be the older brother she deserves. And she knowning that his word is true because he is her brother, believes him. 

Even when the two of them lost their parents in the house fire, she never felt scared for she knew that her brother was there. Her brother was there to protect her. She smiles at the memory of how he used to stroke her hair when she was scared, how he used to hold her in a brotherly embrace, whispering to her on stormy nights that everything was going to be alright. She remembers how he used to sing to her in his deep voice, the French lullabies their mother sung whenever she couldn't get to sleep. She can hear as she drifts off in the world of her memories, her brother whispering the words, "I will always be there for you" as he tries to comfort her through the dark, cold nights. 

 As she falls deeper into her memories, she reminisces about the moment her brother tells her that he will never let anyone separate them and that if they did, they would feel the wrath of a brother wanting to protect his little sister from danger.

But the smile on her face begins to fade away. The man who has made all those promises has been the one to break them. And by breaking them, he shatters all the hopes of a five-year old girl. By the time she is thirteen years old, their relationship changed and in her eyes, he was no longer the brother she knew, but was a stranger.

Her marriage to Squire Thornton was a sham and hatred begins to fester deep within her soul. She has become resentful towards not only her husband but her brother too. Her bitterness towards her brother has caused her to hunger for revenge. She wants answers, answers to questions that have been gnawing in her mind for so many years. Answers only her brother can give.

The moment she escapes from her husband is the moment she finds herself running towards her brother. Running back to a brother she needs answers from. The second their eyes meet all breath leaves her lungs and they are siblings once again. In that moment, he is the brother she knew of old rather than who he has become. She can see that he has changed, but so has she. She is no longer that quite, timid fiver year old girl who needs him to be her guardian. She is a young woman, twenty years of age who needs the man in front of her to be her brother. The brother she loves, the brother who promised to protect her, the one who vowed on his life not to let anyone harm her. All she wants is her brother back. She thinks that he’s pleased to see her, but how wrong she is. She can see something in his eyes. Whether it is guilt or hatred she isn't sure. But, all she knows is that she has found her brother and now she wants answers. Answers about why he gave her away to Thornton.

She chokes back a sob as she hears his answer to her question, "why did you give me away?" His answer stuns her into silence. She had never thought her brother could be so heartless and hearing  he gave her away for a price told her that she never really knew her brother as well as she thought she did. She had thought the reason why her brother gave her away to Thornton was because he wanted what was best for her. Was because he loved her.  But she was wrong. Her brother didn't marry her off out of love; he married her to fulfill his own ambitions.

She has seen him change from the loving brother she knew, to a cold-hearted monster blinded by power and knows that he will never be the brother she loved. Her heart breaks as she comes to realize that she has to accept that he isn't who he was and that she has to let go. Though she knows that he is no longer the brother she knew, she wishes that she could find it within her heart to forgive him. But the hurt he has caused her has made her become just as bitter as he is. 

Wishful thoughts will not bring her brother back to her so as Isabella curls up deeper underneath the covers, tears fall down her cheeks as she cries herself to sleep. Guy, the brother she once idolized is never going to be the brother she knew from her childhood. He is never going to be the one to protect her from the world. She will have to protect herself, and she knows she can do it. She has had to look after herself ever since, her brother gave her away to Thornton. She wishes she could have her brother back, the one she loved, the one she knew rather than who he has become. She wishes that he could him whisper, " I love you" to her once again, to be his dear Isabella, his little sister he loved. But she can’t, she has lost hm. Lost him forever and as she succumbs to sleep, her dreams come to life. She witnesses a little girl with flowers in her hair, smiling, laughing, hand in hand with her older brother.