hazy || niall horan

5. an irresponsible desire

It began with yelling.

Aoife had trained herself to tune out what her foster mum Patricia said most days but she had also trained herself to gives answers meaningful enough to make Patricia think she was listening.

She caught bits and pieces of the fight she was in. Patricia said something about irresponsibility and a lack of common sense.

Aoife sat there praying her face didn't give away her bored expression. Nothing, no amount of hatred could phase her anymore. She sort of got used to being told she was worthless. After enough times you get tired of hearing it.

She made it safely to her room where she could stare at the ceiling in peace.

Niall hadn't said anything when he dropped the two of them off at her less than stellar abode. He simply gave a small glance to the house and then at Aoife before she bolted from his car in embarrassment.

She was sure to see him tomorrow and she would try very hard not to. She did not want his attention. She didn't want to see the pity on his face. She was content with where she was, well not content, but comfortable enough to never want change.

**

Niall walked into literature the day after his father hit him with a nasty bruise beginning to form. He'd met with his friends in the courtyard and said the same thing he usually did. They of course believed the lie and he wasn't sure how much longer he could tell them that him and his brother had gotten in a tussle again before they really started asking why they fought so much.

He looked around the room and just saw faces. They were smiling and laughing and he wished he felt the way they did. But then again, there was someone who seemed to mirror his own feelings.

She sat towards the back of the classroom, she had dark brown hair that Niall recognized. It was his library girl. (He still hadn't quite figured out her name yet.)

She sniffled into a tissue and kept her head in her book on her desk. Her hand laid lazily on the side of her face and her brow was furrowed much like it was every time Niall had seen her before.

He made a beeline for the empty seat beside her, a place he'd never ventured before. Also, how had he not seen her in this class before? Surely he wasn't that daft was he?

As he approached, she looked up, her gray eyes meeting with his blue ones.

Niall smiled a little, a slight hop in his step, but all she did was shake her head slightly. He looked at her for a second but she'd already gone back to focusing on her book. Her reaction made him stop in his steps.

He stopped, as if to not look completely crazy, and sat in the empty seat to his left.

Of course he was crazy. He'd only talked to her twice, he'd only given her a ride because he felt bad that she was walking in the rain. None of that qualified as them being friends. What was he thinking?

Niall knew what he was thinking though. His thoughts were clear as day. The girl intrigued him. Not because he found her attractive and not because of the house-if you could really call it that- she lived in, but because she seemed to make him forget about his father for the few moments he would see her. He had a hard time thinking about much else but she seemed to help him forget a little more than he'd like to lead on.

Literature seemed to drag on because he would try to sneak glances at the girl but she wouldn't acknowledge him.

By the end of the class period he was determined that he would speak to her. But as he was making his mind up and gathering his things as the final bell of the day rang, he noticed she was already out of the classroom.

Niall bolted from the room as fast as he could and searched frantically over the heads of other student. He spotted her short hair 5 feet in front of him, hurriedly walking down the corridor.

He weaved through students and caught up to the girl.

"Are you heading to the library?" He asked. Her head shot up in surprise.

"Yes."

"Do you want a ride?"

"I'm quite fine with walking." Aoife noticed he was extra persistent today.

"Then I'll walk with you!" She could hear the desperation to get to know her in his voice. It made her stop in her tracks.

"Look, Niall, you don't have to pretend to be nice, or if you're being genuine please stop. I'm not good with having friends, I'm not nice about it. Please just leave me alone."

Aoife desperately wanted to find a way out of whatever little bubble he had trapped her in. She did want to be his friend. His charisma and care for her seemed to be genuine to her. But that was the problem. Niall was Niall, golden boy of her school, one of the most important people in her town.

Genuine coming from him was like having a spotlight on those he involved himself with. She wanted to hide behind the veil she'd put herself under and hope and pray nobody would tear that away.

Niall could do all of that, she could sense it. His care was needed, she needed someone to care for her, but it was unwanted, impossible to have.

So she deemed him an irresponsible desire, and stored him so far into her heart not even her own hands could grab at him.

I attached a video of how to pronounce Aoife because I some people ask how to pronounce it! I hope you all enjoyed this!