Behind The Glasses

Chapter 15:

I could not breathe. My hands were claming up, as was the nape of my neck. I still could not breathe. I raised a shaking hand, the teacher saw me, but continued to ingore me, and continued his lecture into the ever so interesting structure of Beryllium. I grab for my bag, but miss; clutching frantically to my stool.

Can't breathe, can't breathe, can't breathe; the thoughts screamed inside my head as I gulped for air.

By now the whole class had turned around, gawping at the hyperventilating girl at the back. Only now the teacher was concered! In three strides he had crossed the chemistry lab to perch beside me, trying to prise my fingers off of my stall, to calm my breathing; but I could not hear what he was saying. I was deaf to the outside world, faces blurring into one sea.  I still could not breathe.

I don't remember hitting the floor, or being carried to the medical room; but it must have happened in order for me to be there now. I smelt my surroundings first: the awful smell of disinfectant and stale coffee. The smell of sick children waiting to go home, of medical room staff reluctantly filling out forms for accidents.

I was lain down upen the small fold up cot they had for those who lost conciousness. But I wasn't the only one - there was a girl perched on the end, clutching a heat pack to her stomach, I groan, straightening; one of the two women looks us from where she is filling out an accident form for thee boy who just jumped down the maths block stairs. 

I wait for her to finish filling out her forms before getting to my feet. After 21 questions I was allowed to leave the medical room, my parents would be informed; well, great lot of use that would be. Outside I breathe out a sigh of relief. Panic attacks are perfectly normal, especially when you are stressed; there was a perfectly reasonable explanation for this.

I could go to my next period, and continue to be the talk of school, or I could go home, and face one of my three possible brothers.

I arrived home to find my brother sat in the lounge, smoking. He did not greet me, or ask about my day at school, nor ask if I wanted a drink; instead, he gave me a list of jobs that needed doing and an earfull for skiving school.

"Did you hear that?" he bellowed as I stormed up the stiars. I continue to ignore Hunter, stomping more vigourously as I swept around my room. I throw down my school bag, emtying the entire contents onto the floor. I hastily grab any of the clean clothes I can find, and bundle them in.

I can hear Hunter pounding up the stiars, taking them two at a time, his feet slamming down on the bare wood of the stairs. In seconds my bedroom door has been thrown wide open. "Don't walk away from me!" he bellowed, the veign at the base of his neck surfaccing; he must be furious.

Well, he could get as angry as he wanted. I don't care. I give up.

There. I finally said it. I am fed up living this pathetic existance. I need to get away.

Now.

"Insolent b**ch" he shrieked, closing the space between us in a matter of seconds. "What do you think you are doing?" his hand clenched against my wrist. I tried to pull away, outraged, enpowered. Hunter was always stronger than me, there was no way I could fight him offf. But I did anyway...and I paid the price: a broken wrist and a black eye.

"Just leave me alone" I manage to finally scream, clutching at my wrist. For a moment Hunter pauses, stepping back to gaze upon his work: a snivelling, cowed sister with a broken wrist and a black eye. I fold at the middle, tears welling and spilling down my face.

I hear him sigh, turning away from me to rip his fingers through his hair. I can feel him slowly counting to ten, breathing in and out as he did so; before quietly leaving the room, and shutting the door behind him.

I swear silently at him in my head over and over again, clutching my wrist. The bathroom has bandages and painkills, a god send. Then, with bandaged wrist I grab my toiletries and fling them into my bag too.

I shower and changed, slowly lugging my bag down the stairs. The kitchen cupbooards are empty, suprise suprise, I grab the money left on the side for this weeks groceries and shove it  in my back pocket.

Hunter is no where to be seen. Good.  

I slam out of the house.

I had taken the bus out to the next town, where I switched to an overnight route. The busdriver sighed as I got on hastilly passed him my ticket. I found a seat on the back row, the only other person a woman in her mid twenties sat at the end of the row, her head resting against the window.

I place my bag safely under the seat, lean my head against the window and sink into sleep.

I wake to find a body leaning against my own, every seat on the bus now occupied, It is the early hours of the morning, the sun just rising; I have a crick in my neck. "It's gorgeous isn't it?" a guy sat a couple of spaces away from me grins, I nod, barely functioning, having just woken up. "So where are you headed?" he asked.

"Last stop" I sigh, "What about you?"

"Touche. What's a little thing like you doing so far from home?"

"I have no home." I reply bluntly.

The stranger stares at me, I stare back; both of us heading away from here. Happy to be anywhere but here. How do I know this? I can see it in his eyes? Dark eyes with a haunted edge, layer upon layer of dark bages in multiple shades of purple and blue. The way his whole face seemed to yawn and sigh with every blink of the eye. The way he slouched in his seat, with the collar pulled right up his neck; his hair brushing the collar of his shirt underneath. 

"I'm Adam, and this is Owen" the stranger announced, indicating to his sleeping friend. "You heading anywhere nice?"

"Just to a friends" I mutter. I'm sure my 'friend' will be very pleased to see me; seeing as we haven't spoken in two years, and he doesn't know I'm coming. We weren't even that close in the first place...

"Sorry, are you heading anywhere nice?" I automatically snap back. I cringe at how alien my voice sounds, how croaky and loud it is in comparison to the silence of the sleeping coach.  Adam chuckled, nudging the passangers either side of him as he did so; "Me? I'm off training. I don't kow if you've heard about it, but there's a huge race coming up in a couple of weeks - not anywhere round here, it's in the middle of nowhere, some town you've probably never even heard of. Anyway, I'm going home; I want to get some good training in before I compete, aparently you can win big money there".

"Good luck" I smile.

"EVer heard of the race?" Adam smiled,

"No" I lied, "Racing isn't really my thing"

"I didn't think it would be" Adam smiled again, "It's not as grand as it sounds - I bike as opposed to, you know, racing with cars" - I grunt a reply, turning my head to the window, hoping to drop off to sleep again; and not have to keep talking to Adam; it wasn't that i disliked him, I was just about an inch away from bursting into tears right now.

"Can i borrow your phone?" I ask suddenly; Adam rummages around in his pockets. "Thanks" I add, as he passes it over. Slowly i begin to dial the digits, cringing at how vividly I can remember the number.  The line is picked up after two rings, my voice trembles.

"Hey, it's Harper"...