to my past lovers

gonna

july 13, 2017

owen,

this letter isn't going to be long, because you don't deserve that kind of letter. people like you don't even deserve letters.

but you have been blessed no matter how much of a prick you are, and how much guilt you put girls under.

i am actually disgusted that my heart thought that it knew you. it was wrong. i am not going to fantasize the moments that you were, i am only going to focus what you are now.

not one girl on this planet, owen, should even acknowledge you. you use them, and you throw them away, and you make sure to clean up the dirt on your hands.

your hands that touched me.

thinking about you just makes me want to throw up all the words i've been feeding myself about you. because i always had the idea of you being the guy that set the record straight, but no, you turned out to be the guy that only knew how to take advantage.

because everyone knew what you are, and you were owen. perfect, planned, golden owen.

the whole world knows what you did to me that night owen, how i had to scream to forcefully push you out of my face.

how you said you were "drunk" but you're eyes knew exactly what you were doing. i wasn't going to let you win.

i am not gonna say sorry for the opportunities you lost because of what i spread all around the school against you. i wasn't only protecting myself, like the selfish bitch you think i was, i'm protecting all the girls i knew you'd do the same thing to.

i was protecting the future you never deserved.

i wasn't gonna let you get away with that.

so, wherever you are, sitting in a couch watching tv, in your lame job, missing all the future you could have had, but your reputation was ruined, i hope regret is in your mind.

you can't touch me, owen. but you did anyways.

i am not gonna say sorry for the future i made sure that wasn't in your reach anymore.

by the way, you never said you we're sorry.

but i bet you're really sorry now.

without a single drop of love,
lanie