My Reviews and Reads

Blinding Light; The Taken

Author: @RyanJStories 

So, as I keep saying, in these reviews in 100% honest. The whole reason I do these reviews is to help people out and sugarcoating just doesn't do that. So with that said, here's the review.

Cover, Title and Blurb:

The blurb is great! It's not too long or too short. I like that it's to the point, giving enough information to show the reader that this is a refreshingly unique and different story! I also like the cover. It's not instantly eye catching but the summary makes up for that. Otherwise, I think the cover is fine. I'm not really sure what to say about the title. I feel it doesn't exactly let the reader know what to expect from the book. I mean I get the reference to "the taken" but I still think that maybe the title should help in explaining the book's contents a little more. However; if you'd like to keep it, it's totally fine because it's really not that bad! :)

Grammar:

Aside from small, almost unnoticeable mistakes, you are fine in this section. Maybe just read over the chapters once and fix the mistakes. Other than that there is really nothing more i can say. You've done a great job here👍

Flow:

Okay so this is one flaw in your otherwise great story. I feel like the pace of the story is alright, though a little on the fast side. That's not the issue though. I realize that as an author, you know your plot inside out. That's why sometimes you fail to mention details as you go along. It happens to me all the time. Although your plot is great and I like how you have a backstory as to how the kith were formed, till the last chapter I still felt as though I wasn't completely understanding everything. You kept bringing up new characters and details and I kind of felt lost, which is a shame because your plot is amazing. Some of the chapters feel kind of vague. I'm not really sure how to say this but I hope you get what I mean. Try reading the chapters from the point of the reader, I think you'll get what I'm trying to say.

Characters:

I love the names of each of your characters!They are so different and unique!

I really like Maihe and Talon and how you shift between their point of views.

I also love how Maihe is the only female leader! Go Maihe!☺

Maihe's and Jocasta's relationship, though interesting, seems to come out of nowhere. I mean one minute we find out that she likes him but can't be with him and the next minute he likes her too and they are bonded?! I wish you would expand a little more on their relationship as it promises to be an interesting one and expanding on it would also help the reader to have more of an emotional investment.

Other than that I think your characters are good!👍

Other Thoughts:

Firstly I love the surprises you kept throwing at the reader! You constantly kept me guessing as to who is causing the fires. I'm still not sure! I really liked how you made it seem as though Jocasta had indeed betrayed Maihe and then surprise! We realize that Whisker could be the bad but?! Amazing job with the twists!! But wait for you seriously kill off Jocasta?! Why?😦

One thing is like to add is I wish you'd explain things like being "a little" or being "taken" and "proxys" and other minor details a bit more.

I didn't get the prologue though. On its own I think it's great. I found it interesting and I really wanted to continue reading immediately but it didn't make sense with the rest of the story. Maybe you can link it some more?

I love your descriptions of the setting and characters. It really draws the reader in! Fantastic job!

Advice:

My only advice is to go over the story and read it from the point of view of a reader. As the that's the only thing you're lacking, with it fixed your story will be perfect!

I do recommend this story! Underneath its minor mistakes lies an amazing and unique plot which is super intriguing. Once the mistakes have been fixed, this story really does have the potential to go places, I promise! 

Goodluck @RyanJStories with this book! Don't worry your book is great! It's only the first draft. Trust me, it going to turn out fantastic!❤👍           -Rose