OMG kan u bliev it?! lik srsly, ppl kan ttly read dis esily. i swr. its tru.
And I honestly don't care if the human mind is able to process that gibberish. Just because it can be read doesn't mean it should.
Now you could argue that it's a good idea. It challenges the human brain to think in the and intriguing ways while performing a relatively menial task. I beg to differ.
First of all, text writing is annoying. If I'm reading something, I want a story to be woven effortlessly in front of my eyes, sending me off on a magic carpet ride where unicorns prance, murderers dance, and Romans drink merrily. I don't want to sit in front of my screen, frowning and mouthing the "words" in a sad attempt to figure out what letters may be missing. I know how to read and I don't appreciate the feeling of illiteracy. It's icky and seriously annoying. I've been in school way too long to try to relearn how to read.
Secondly, it's disrespectful as it discriminates. Text talk selects for readers who are well versed in it, sort of like a scientific paper. Unlike a scientific paper, however, stories are supposed to be addressed to anyone. If I started describing the variable mechanisms of action between Type 3 and 4 secretion systems, their relations to AB toxins, HGT, and pathogenicity (or maybe saponification, Wittig reactions, the different kinds of meteorites, or travertine formation) you'd be wearing the same look I get when I read text-talk-style written stories.
Not only is it confusing, it's also just plain old laziness. If you can't find the time to properly type out a word (or at least try then spell-check it), what are you doing trying to write a book? There's this old saying "Everything you do, do properly." (and yes, I had to translate it so it sounds weird). Live by that rule.
If you can type properly but you think you're too cool to spell out a word completely or just don't want to, you're looking into the wrong profession. An editor, professor or publisher will not even glance at a "manuscript" with text talk in it unless it's satire -- you have been warned. Besides, since when is it cool to not type properly (Oh hey guys, I'm just going to display my laziness and show you all how I just don't give two shits about the effort you have to put in to understand me. Thanks for being my friend. By the way, I also don't care about how I portray myself to the world even if I look like a total self-centered jackass. YOLO)?
For another thing, it doesn't differentiate your work from the masses (and I do mean masses) of hideously typed books on Wattpad. Be special, be unique, type out all your God damn words.
I, therefore, have a proposal for all you Wattpaddians. Since it's rude to talk about something that someone else can't understand, I won't talk about my little sciencey stuff if you don't text talk, potassium?
(Note to all confused readers, potassium's elemental symbol is K. I can hear the "Oh"s from here. I really need to work on my jokes, I know.)
