bright - h.s

eleven

A/N: HI HI HI :)

OMFG, I AM SO SORRY, I NEVER UPDATE OR ANYTHING. I HAVE BEEN OVERWHELMED WITH EVERYTHING GOING WITH MY LIFE, AND I KNOW I SAY THIS ALL THE TIME, BUT I WILL TRY TO UPDATE MORE.

COMMENTING, VOTING AND SHARING MY STORY JUST MAKES ME WHAT TO WRITE MORE FOR ALL MY READERS! 

Keep that in mind...

But, without further to do... ENJOY THIS REALLY NEEDED UPDATE.

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Nova p.o.v

Numerous days had gone by, I even lost count of how many did, since Oliver and I talked. When we saw each other, we would both nod but not say a single word. I guess it was awkward between us, and there was this weird tension. Why did I ever have to tell him that I wanted to kiss him? It was a stupid thing to say, and I should have kept it to myself. Of course he would reject me! He is gorgeous and cool, and I'm just me. Nova freakin' Cole. I'm normal yet too weird to be with a guy like him. He's in here cos' of alcohol and drugs, I'm in here cos' im a freak who cuts herself out of self hatred. 

How pathetic am I?

I shook my thoughts away, not wanting to think about it too much and climbed the stairs to the pottery house. I always sucked at pottery, but Aurra and I decided to do it together. She was already sitting down on the stool with her turning table in front of her and a large piece of clay. 

"Hi!" I said while sitting down at on the stool next to her.

"Hey Nov-" She replied with a big smile.

"So, how's your day going?"

"So far so good." 

"Have you seen Vems since this morning?"

"No, not yet... I think he decided to do the voice lessons today."

"Vems? Singing?" I asked surprised.

"Yeah, apparently he just goes there to listen. I think he has a soft spot for the arts."

I wet my piece of clay, and started turning the wheel. My hands tried molding the clay into some sort of bowl, but didn't succeed, it just stayed a lump.

"So Nova, what's going on?" Aurra asked.

"What do you mean...?"

"For the last couple of days, you seem... out of it. You can tell me you know? I'm your best friend, not you psychiatrist trying to analyse you."

"I don't know what to say." I kept my head down, not wanting to make any eye contacte with her. She could easily see right through me.

"You can trust me Nova. Please." She pleaded, trying to search for my eyes. 

I looked up at her, fighting back the tears that were threatening to spill at any moment. I hate having people see me cry, it's a sign of weakness, and that's when people can take advantage of you the most. But not Aurra, so I let the wall blocking my emotions break. 

"I fucked up Aurra, I really did..." Tears started flowing out of my eyes, and I couldn't stop them. It was too late. 

"Oh baby... what do you mean?" Her voice was calm and pure. Just the sound of her voice comforted me.

"I guess it's an overload of everything. My shoulders feel weighed down by embarrassment and regret. I've been overthinking everything, and it has gotten me some deep shit." I managed to say between sniffles.