Skymedia meets mystreet : a skymau fanfic

Sorry.

Okay so I am not going to ducking sugarcoat any shit here, I am not going to say I am not updating because of school or writers block. Let me think, I am fucking losing it. My head is everywhere, I am stressed shitless, I am scared, tired, upset. I can not describe it all. I just can't, maybe I am taking this way too far.
Now I think about it no, I often tend to cry myself to sleep, I have nightmares. Abuse.
I am a victim of abuse, why do I write fan fics with abuse? It feels like stress flooding off me. It feels less, how do I put it, harder to live. I bet you are wondering well why don't I just kill myself, I know I have a future ahead and anyone that's thinking of killing themselves,the world may be shit now, shit changes. It might not be for months, years but it always changes. Hell nobody planed my life to go this way, heck I have no idea what the fuck am I going to do with my life. But I am not going to end it because of some horrible shit that happened, fuck no. Scars on my skin may stay, they will die down, even if they don't. I am heartbroken right now, I trusted someone and they shoved all that shit back in my fucking face. It must sound weird, I am like in my early teens my life has feel apart I am heartbroken boohoo. Fucking hell, it may have fell apart but I am going to stick it back together, I have sibling, a mum. A couple of good friends. And if I died I am not even thinking about my pain, I am thinking about theirs. I really can't do this. But I will. I will be a fighter, a solider. A warrior. I will stick through it. Anyone can, just try. God that feels good to get that off my chest.