Swift and Beautiful and Bright-a Lams high school au

II

"Bonjour, bitches," Lafayette said, sliding across the grass to the group. Everyone laughed loudly as Laf sat up. John, who had been sitting against the school, looked up at the sound of Alex's distinctive laughter. He smiled at him, glancing back down at his sketchbook. Lafayette went over to John. "What are you drawing, mon ami?" He asked.

John blushed, showing Lafayette the drawing. It was a semi-realistic drawing of Alex laughing. "Since when do you draw your friends?" Lafayette stated in disbelief. John shrugged, closing his sketchbook.

Lafayette knew that John didn't draw people without a reason. It was Eliza when he needed to relax, his mother when he was upset. At one point, Lafayette was the subject of many of John's drawings. Lafayette sleeping, or smiling, or crying, or reading, or laughing. Lafayette had been everything that was important to John. The subject of all of his feelings. But then Lafayette ruined everything.

He had an addiction, he knew that. Sex became all that mattered to him. He pushed John to do things before he was ready, not caring about how he felt. John did it anyway, whatever he could to keep Lafayette with him. John had convinced himself that he couldn't live without Lafayette, and Laf took advantage of that.

John used to look at Lafayette the way he now looked at Alex. But Lafayette knew that John had never trusted anyone again. He didn't let himself love anyone the way he'd loved Lafayette. Lafayette's eyebrows furrowed at the thick scar peeking out of John's sweater sleeve. He knew it was his fault. He wanted to make it right.

-

John was sitting in his room, sketching his turtle out of boredom, when he got a text.

Laf: hello

John texted him back immediately, glad to have something to do.

John: hey what's up

Laf: look, I noticed how you look at Alex. Do you like him?

John: dude, no.

Laf: mon ami, you can't lie to me. You drew him.

John: and?

Laf: you never draw any of us unless we pay you to.

John: dude, enough. I don't like him.

Laf: is that true? Or are you just lying to yourself because you don't want to date again. I get it, we had a toxic relationship, and we were really bad for each other. But you need to get yourself back out there. Not every relationship will end up like ours... it's alright to have feelings for someone, you know.

John looked up, thinking about it for a moment before texting Laf back.

John: alright, I like him... but you have to promise you won't tell anyone...

Laf: it's like you've never met me. Of course, mon ami.

John: and that also means you can't try to force us to get together. Idk if Alex is even gay or bi or whatever.

Laf: that one will be a little harder to keep, but I will try my best. I need to go. Have a good day.

John laughed, sending a quick goodbye and setting his phone back down. His smile faded as he remembered his and Laf's history.