The Chosen Heart II (m.t)

39

AERA POV

When I first stepped my feet in my house , I started to feel nervous..I can feel my blood were flowing really fast in my vein , I almost shed a tears but I hold it on incase Jinyoung and Jaebum would see me crying.I slowly walk inside the house and closed my eyes.Then I heard a laugh of Mark.. "Oh my gosh.. I'm not strong.. please.." I thought myself when I can't hold my tears anymore.

I stroked my tummy and get a few stepped more.Then I gestured the couch which is beside me.I gestured it slowly... and I closed my eyes again .. trying to recall the time that I was with Mark on this couch.. we're having a great discussion on planning to our honeymoon.. tsk.. tsk.. we were laughing and hugging on this couch.. suddenly I felt a hugged from my back and its feel real..

Then I opened my eyes and realised that there were just my imaginations.. My tears flowing even more and I can't walk again.. my legs feel so weak that I can't even move an inch.. but I tried to keep my heart stronger and I walk slowly upstairs.. I held the stairs handle tightly while observing the whole views upstairs.

When I get to the top of the stairs my body started to tremble and I felt a cold breezes passing me.. I walk again towards my room.. the room that I used to share with Mark.. and my heart suddenly felt so much hurt.. I pressed my chest and closed my eyes.. I can feel my eyes already swollen because I'm crying so much ever since I get in the house..

I sat on my bed and stroking my tummy again.."Do you miss your father.. dear.. ?  I miss him so much !! Tsk.. Tsk.. I miss him so much dear.. If only I could tell you how much I miss him .. but we will never see him again.. you will never see your father.. I'm sorry dear.. I could not be a good mother to you.." I talked with my son in my tummy alone.. I felt so bad as a mommy that separated a son with his father..

"Maybe.. your father forget us already.. maybe you father don't even know us anymore.. tsk.. tsk.. its okay.. you have your mommy here.. that will always be with you.. no matter what happens.. mommy will always by your side.. okay dear.. ?" I said again.. I can't stop my tears amd just let it flows like that.. it hurt me so much..

"God I miss him so muchh.. please let me see his face for once.. please I just want to meet him.. I want to hug him.. I really miss himm.. " I said.

Then I heard Jinyoung and Jaebum called my name.. I went downstairs slowly and they saw me crying.. Jinyoung hugged me and patted my back.. "No.. no.. don't cry.. its okay.. let the past be the past okay.. don't cry..." Jinyoung calmed me down.. I cry on Jinyoung chest as much as I can.. I can't hold it anymore.. it just really hurt.. thinking back about the past.. just like a nightmare to me.. "Come on.. lets back home now.." Jinyoung hugged me while walking to the car..

I take a look at my house for the last time..  and suddenly I felt something told me that I shouldn't left the house.. then I started to think again before getting in the car.."Maybe.. If I stay here for a few days.. I will meet Mark.. Maybe Mark will come here.." I thought.Then I told Jinyoung and Jaebum that I wanna stay in my house for a few days.. but they worried if something would happen to me if I were alone..

But I just confirmed them that I will be okay.. "I felt a strong instinct that told me to stay here.. oppa.. don't worry.. I'll be back home soon.. just tell mommy that.." I said to them.Then they just looked at each other and said okay to me.. I get in my house back when they left me..

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