Angels Can Fly

Chapter 1

      We reach our new house, a three-story miniature villa. My room is almost the entire third floor with a bathroom in it and a balcony. I climb the stairs and start unpacking, reveling in the feel of the soft tan carpet on my bare feet. I set up my bed, wasting a good half hour putting it together and another ten minutes moving it to where I want. I set up my dresser and vanity, then my bookshelves and chairs to make a small library. I have enough books for a small library, and I read the spine of every single one as I put them up. My tastes range from Alice in Wonderland and Other Such Stories to The Complete Works of Edgar Allan Poe. Next, I pull out all my bags of clothes and put them on my bed, telling myself I'll go through them later.

I start to pull out my easel and painting supplies next, to set up by the balcony door, but stop when I see my bag of razors. I don't feel the urge yet, so I take the bag and stash it under my pillow. I finish setting everything up, then begin putting away the small things, like my makeup in the vanity. I put up some posters on my wall, my favorite being the one from the last concert I went to, Shinedown. I put a "Do Not Enter" sign on my door and go back in my room. As I pass my full-length mirror, I accidentally glance over and catch a look at myself. I stop and walk over to the mirror slowly. I'm short with limp blonde hair and dull gray eyes. I'm extremely skinny. Too skinny. Too short. Too small. Too ugly. My bottom lip trembles as I begin to cry. I'm exactly everything he said.

I have two days left of summer break until I start my junior year at my new school, Star Preparatory Institute. Prestigious name, but I'm sure it's going to be just like every other school I've been to. This is only the fourth one I've been to since 8th grade when I met --. I begin to pick out my outfit for the first day. I choose a pair of black skinny jeans and a black t-shirt that says "Shh... Nobody cares" on it. I also grab a red plaid over shirt to be tied around my waist. I find my knee length black leather combat boots, then set it all up in my closet. When I go downstairs, I find my dad in the kitchen at the table reading a newspaper.
"LOCAL TEEN BULLIED TO DEATH" is on the front. I turn away and my dad looks up at the movement, quickly putting away the paper.
"Hey sweetheart. Going outside?" he asks, unable to hide the hope in his voice. I nod then write on a napkin, 'Can I have $20?' He looks at me for a second then hands me $40. I try to give him back a twenty dollar bill but he merely says, "Whatever it is, take it. Have fun darling. I'm glad you're getting out." I write, 'I'm going to the mall. Love you.'

I drive to the mall and park near the entrance to the Bed, Bath and Beyond. I get out of my car, put my headphones in and turn up the sound to full volume. "If You're Thinking of Leaving, You Should" by Social Repose plays. I try to hum along but stop because my voice is scratchy from lack of use. I walk into the mall, marveling at how big it but noting that it's not as big as the mall at our last town in Connecticut. I find a map and look for my favorite store, Hot Topic, and once I find it, I start walking in the direction it's in. When I get there, I take out one of my earbuds and smile for the first time today. The guy behind the counter, the only person in the store, looks over and greets me. I look over then gape. He's fucking cute. He looks to be about my age, with long floppy black hair. He's really tall and lanky, but none of that was what I was staring at. He has the most beautiful violet eyes, my favorite color. As I stand there staring, I become aware that he is staring back. I suddenly move away to the back so he can't see how ugly I am. I begin looking at some of the dresses until one catches my eye. It's a black and red plaid dress with a sweetheart neckline and a bodice that would come to my knees. I look at it and eventually check the price, expecting to be sad. But instead I see that it's on sale for 90% off, making it only $10. I take it and turn around, jumping. Violet Eyes is standing right behind me.
"Hello..." he says hesitantly. "Sorry for scaring you." I shrug and move around him, repeating in my head 'Get away. You don't talk.' He stops me. "I'm Lucas. What's your name?" By way of answering, I show him the dress, then take out my phone and put my music in, close to tears. He looks at me weird, then wordlessly rings up the dress. I walk out and go to the bathroom where I break down and silently sob. Why am I like this?