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For reasons unknown, I was asked to review chapter 5 of The Mondlicht Chip. I've nothing against the number 5, but before diving in, I hoped to know what was going on in the story. Thankfully, the synopsis is very detail-oriented.
I'll admit, the title of the chapter immediately hooked me: "Robots on a train". I thought, robots don't ride trains! Or do they? In the world as dictated by Damienrocks118 (aka Mr. X), they most certainly do. However, those wiley suckers don't show up until about halfway into the chapter.
Before that, some scientists discuss strategy for capturing the elusive Cyfox, who is part fox, part computer. *mind. blown* I liked the conversations, which read very organically, yet are full of enough description to help the reader along.
Later, we're transported to the main character's POV, who is keeping Cyfox out of sight. During their shenanigans, they (you guessed it) board a train. Since Cyfox is part robot, technically, she's the robot on the train (as promised in the chapter title). But hold on, more bots called H-forcers show up, looking to nab Cyfox. In their desperation to escape, Cyfox convinces the main character to drive the train.
Through wild, and at times ridiculous, plot points, the author injects humor. I found the chapter to be engaging, but some thoughts to make it stronger:
Use line breaks to separate dialogue, as it got confusing at times. Also, all caps should be used sparingly, or never. Most likely, the reader will understand the emotion you wish to convey if you show them through what the character is saying or doing.
