A/N
Um I didn't really know what I'm doing any more when I write??it's kind of random and bad nowadays, so don't expect any good writing from me basically..yeah. For this chapter I kind of just winged it. I put in headphones and listened to fifth harmony to get my ideas flowing, and this is what happened.
so enjoy I guess?
Oh and side note tomorrow I'm starting school (rip) and I really want to do well this year. So very less updates.
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Hayley paced her room. Thoughts overflowing her head like a flood. Every step cracking her body. Too many racing thoughts bumping around in her head and it was too much. She let her hand grab her shirt on her chest, just above her heart as she lowered herself to the ground. Sobs escaping the girl's mouth. The brunette bit hed lip and tried her best to quit the following cries. Her chocolate eys filled with wet tears.
Everything was becoming too much. She really tried her best in dance, but her headaches became too much and she was driven home no matter how hard she tried to fight against them. Now she had accidently stained Annie's clothes for the interview when she did a laundry.
She knew Katie had been upset with her after the hotel incident, but she didn't expect this. She didn't expect her own mother to use force as a punishment.
Hayley never expected to find herself on the ground holding her cheek. And wa never expected to see her own mom glaring at her as she flew out of the room in tears.
Hayley really tried to please the people around her. Annie said she was eating too much of the snacks so she decided she would just stop eating so much. She tried her best to continue dancing but lately her coaches had noticed all the times she would get dizzy and would lose focuses. They had temporarily decided they would take away her solo in the dance until she felt better.
But Ellie, Hayley's closet coach, knew that wasn't the only problem. She saw the way the girl's endless energy had decreased a lot. She saw that the band aids on her hand had turned into wraps. Ellie could see the already slim girl get even slimmer to the point where she was starting to worry a lot about Hayley's health. She knew the thirteen year old needed help, but she would wait until Hayley came to her.
Now the girl who carried so much weight on her shoulders was crashing. Maybe she was overreacting, Hayley thought as she tried to get herself together.
A lot of kids got hit by their parents, right? This was just nothing, right? Hayley nodded to herself as she took deep breathes.
Maybe it wasn't, but all Hayley knew was that she needed to get out. She needed to go some place to breath. So she stood carefully and grabbed her phone and her ear buds.
The girl silently made her way out of the apartment and soon she was finding herself running down the steps and out to the streets. Her stomach growled, but she simply ignored it and put her headphones in. Clicking a recent Playlist, the forever sound of real calmness and peace filled her ears.
Hayley wasn't really sure where she was going, but she needed to go somewhere.
Hayley walked under the sun's gentle heat and tried to block out as much as she could. She didn't want to be here. No, she wanted to be at home with her dad. Bur she didn't have a choice. For now she could avoid her sister's and her mother's eyes, but later she'd have to go back to the apartment. There was no way in hell Hayley would stay outisde in LA, in the middle of the night. Hell, she shouldn't have been out here alone in the first place.
The thirteen year old's phone buzzed in her pocket, and she felt afraid to pick it up. Who would it be?
Paige
Message:
Hey Hay, the plane is just landing so tell your mom! :)
Hayley hissed and cursed herself for forgetting that pen of her closest cousins were coming over to visit.
She bit her lip and decided to leave the message unaswered. Hayley didn't need to talk someone right now. She just needed herself.
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After her phone buzzed eight more times, Hayley found herself standing by the ocean. She did what she multiple times before. What she did when she was feeling stressed or alone.
The girl who was brave and had a kind heart stood at the waves of an empty part of a beach. Her shoes tossed the side. Eyes closed and she held her arms out as if to say; "I'm free". Soft sand seeking into her toes and salty waves falling onto her feet.
Her Annie, not the one she knew now, her Annie, had taught her this after she noticed her little sister's anxiety got worse. Hayley could remember the day so clearly.
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"Just stand there. And yell! Yell at the world and tell it hoe you're not going to back down!" Annie shouted from afar.
Hayley blinked turning around confusion written all over her face. Annie smiled softly and nodded. She stepped closer and closed her eyes. She held out her arms and opened her mouth.
"I hate that I hate my image! I hate that I can't please my fans! I'm weak when it comes to hate and I cry when I get scared!" The girl shouted, turning her head and looking at Hayley with one open eye.
"But you know what? You can mess with me all you want to! Because I know for a fact I'm going to rise and rise again!" She added, a smile coming into her lips."Those people, they don't control me. I'm Annie, and that's who I'll always be."
She opened her eyes at last and looked over, smiling when she saw Hayley had down the same.
"I hate that I get upset over minor things and the fact that I get scared when I talk to people! I hate when my anxiety gets the best of me and I'm on my knees again. I really freaking hate myself when I can't be a good dancer!" The girl shouted, keeping her eyes shut tightly.
"But you know what?! I'm so much freaking stronger than I think I am! My name is Hayley LeBlanc and no one will ever take that away from me!"
And when she opened her eyes she was met with the sight of an ocean and a clear sky. She felt like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. Sometimes all it to was admitting but realizing who you really are and who you really can be.
And in that moment, Hayley LeBlanc finally found herself again.
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But as she opens her mouth this time, no words came out. Just a shaky breath. Her feet stumbled back and her knees dug into the sand as she fell.
She had broke.
Hayley could no longer find that piece of her. There was no longer that voice in her head that gave her that tiny amount of inspiration for herself. At that moment, Hayley believed she was just going to shatter. Because the people who once gave her the most inspiration were no longer in sight and that hurt her more than anything could've.
She was happier when she had her brother. She was happier when she had her sister. She was happier when her parents still loved eachother.
But all of that was gone.
And she didn't know what could make her happy any more.
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Sorry? That's all I had?? Anyways last post of the summer for me (cries). So yeah. Hope you enjoyed and I would love feedback in the comments, and feel free to vote if you really enjoyed it! :) goodnight, you guys ♡
-Lily
YOU ARE READING
Empty Handed
Fanfiction"Hayley, done be rude. Give it to her." "stop it and be a nice sister. Give your sister a turn." "Oh my, Hayley get over it. Let Annie have it already." "Seriously, I'm tired of your attitude. Give her the gift." ----- After Annie went famous, I was...
